Friday, August 25

At Least They're #1 At Something.

Drink up, Milwaukee.

Milwaukee Is Named ‘Drunkest City.’

MILWAUKEE - Milwaukee has been ranked by as "America's Drunkest City" on a list of 35 major metropolitan areas ranked for their drinking habits.

Forbes said Tuesday it used numbers from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to rank cities in five areas: state laws, number of drinkers, number of heavy drinkers, number of binge drinkers and alcoholism.

Minneapolis-St. Paul was ranked second overall; followed by Columbus, Ohio; Boston; Austin, Texas; Chicago; Cleveland; Pittsburgh and then Philadelphia and Providence, R.I., in a tie for ninth.

Rick DeMeyer, 28, said Wednesday as he was celebrating his birthday at G-Daddy's BBC he could understand Milwaukee's ranking.

"I have had people stay with me from London and Chicago, and they can't get over how much we drink," he said. "I guess we do."

But officials at Visit Milwaukee, the area's convention and visitors bureau, contend that the city has come a long way in ridding itself of its beer-guzzling image.

Milwaukeeans have plenty of other ways to entertain themselves without drinking alcohol, said Dave Fantle, a spokesman for the group. He noted a new convention center and baseball park had been built and the Milwaukee Art Museum expanded in recent years.

"We've gone from Brew City to new city," he said.

Psht. Like there was any ever question.
You say can that again.

With the University of Wisconsin being the #1 party school and all, I was secretly hoping that Madison would be somewhere on the list. Perhaps we're too responsible, or maybe we don't have enough bona fide alcoholics.

It should be noted that I cleaned out my storage unit last night in preparation for our move, and I found that case of Barley Wine I hid in there several months ago. Remember that? It was a very pleasant surprise.
This post HASN'T been removed by the author. Take THAT Blogger!
I think that Madison is the #1 Most Fashionably Drunk city.

See, you didn't believe Jeff that you could forget about a case of beer...I was going to ask you the other day if you were planning to drink it, but then I figured you may have forgotten about it and didn't want to ruin the surprise.
Believe me, it was a surprise. I can't wait to put it in our new basement and forget about it all over again. Just like those corpses we've been stowing.

Madison is the #1 fashionably anything city. Of course, because we're on an isthmus, Global Warming will eventually cause the whole damn works to float away one day.
Walker told me Madison has AIDS.
I think University of Texas has now taken over first place for "Biggest Party School" was on the other day.

I think I will celebrate Milwaukee's achievement by shotgunning a six-pack of "Milwaukee's Best." ...okay, not really, even I have standards.

::shotguns six-pack of Miller High Life instead::
I made my contribution to Milwaukee by killing off more PBR's than I wish to count. I'm on vacation, and it's 3:00 AM. I believe I will sleep, though drunken wireless rocks just a bit.
...Drunken Ebay, however, not so much.

Texas can take the title for a while, it was giving us a bad name. It should be noted that I saw Barry Alvarez (Badgers head coach) at Wal-Mart the other day.

Truth be told, I've never liked 'Milwaukee' beers. I'm more of a snooty microbrew guy, although girly drinks are still tops in my book.

"Hey CDP, wanna beer?"

"Nah, can I have a Rainbow Skim Fizz to go with my veggie burger?"

(Gets hit with chair.)
Drunken iTunes is also dangerous. I was not aware until this morning that I like Wall of Voodoo's "Mexican Radio," or Busta Rhymes as much as I apparently did at 3:00 AM. No one has ever accused me of being a smart man.

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