Friday, March 9

Lost Friday - "Enter 77."

Lost Friday - Enter 77.
Season 3 - Episode 11: "Enter 77."

Another Lost Friday is upon us. We have much to discuss.

Seriously.

For real this time. It was a stellar episode.

But first, a trademark rant.

Boy howdy, what a week I've been having. The massive cold I've been fighting for 6 days has dissipated to the point where I can now focus entirely on my undeniable case of Strep Throat (I'm on antibiotics, but it still hurts like hell). I'm sucking on cough drops and downing Pomegranate juice like there's no tomorrow, but I'm smart enough to realize that Strep Throat only goes away when it's good and ready. Sort of like Ryan Seacrest.

My office has become a makeshift bedroom for a close friend, complete with her pet bird, which she likes to let out of the cage from time to time. For hours on end, my cats sit outside of the closed office door, wailing and begging for their chance to pounce in and eat it. The incessant peeping and screeching of said bird has actually stressed one of my cats out to the point of peeing in my shower on a bi-daily basis. This doesn't bother me too much, as I myself have a habit of peeing in the shower on a bi-daily basis. I just don't like having to wait in line.

Note: Birds are not pets.

My mother came down to Madison last weekend to attend schooling for an upcoming job. On the second day in, her car broke down at the mall, and I had to leave work early to pick her up. No sooner did I pull into the J.C. Penney parking lot, when her car started and she drove away. It's a good thing, though, because the last time I tried to jump-start a car, I only succeeded in jump-starting the poop from my pants.

Speaking of which, my car set a personal record this week for the most amount of dashboard lights illuminated at once. Five, count 'em, FIVE lights were on at the same time. They were:

Low Fuel light.
Check Coolant light.
Brake Fluid light
Fasten Seat Belt light.
Trunk Ajar light

On top of that, I was out of Windshield Washer Fluid, and drove home from work in a muddy haze. I'll have you know that I fixed every one of these issues in my garage last night, which marked the first time in 4 years that I had to wash grease off of my hands. Pouring fluids into specifically labeled holes under my hood made me feel like such a man!

As you can gather, the last 10 days have been a bit trying and thankless for yours truly. I'll get over it, though, with a heaping helping of The Thick & Meaty!

The Thick & Meaty!

IN FLASHBACKS:

Sayid is working as a chef in a Paris restaurant (buh? why? how?), when a seemingly satisfied customer wants to speak with him. This customer offers Sayid a job at his own restaurant, which Sayid accepts, but not before torturing 10 people on the way out with various forms of cutlery.

As you would assume, Sayid walks into a trap. The wife of the restaurant owner claims that Sayid tortured her when he was still in the Republican Guard. The goons play a game of punchy-kicky with Sayid and lock him in the back room, forcing him to make fettuccine alfredo at gunpoint for all of eternity.

For several days, they beat on Sayid and ask him to confess to torturing Amira. Sayid refuses, claiming that he would never torture a woman and that they have the wrong guy. Eventually, Amira shows up, cat in hand, and gives Sayid a little moral lesson on admitting when you're about to get your ass handed to you for no good reason. Sayid confesses to the torturing (we don't actually know if he was telling the truth or not), and Amira lets him go.

On the way out, Sayid tortures 10 more people with various forms of cutlery.

ON THE BEACH:

The castaways find and set up the ping-pong table that survived the Hatch implosion. Sawyer, still pissed that everyone made off with all of his alcohol and porn, offers to play anyone for a chance to win it back. Hurley accepts the challenge for the castaways, and promptly destroys him faster than his Pie Eating Contest victory the week prior. As part of the agreement, Sawyer can no longer give people nicknames for an entire week, thus removing what little humor was left in this show.

Hurley gives Sawyer back his porn and lets him know that Kate will be okay. Sawyer responds by torturing Hurley with various forms of cutlery.

AT THE FLAME:

(Just a reminder; the Flame Station is not to be confused with the 'Flamer' Station. Whereas the Flame station is hot, the Flamer station is FAAAABULOUS'!)

Kate, Sayid and Locke find their way to the Flame Station, where Sayid takes one for the team and gets shot in the arm in order to infiltrate. There, they run into Patchy and get to talkin'.

And he sez'...

Mikhail says he grew up in Kiev and joined the Soviet Army. He was stationed at a listening post in Vladivostok. His unit was decommissioned when the Cold War ended. He replied to a newspaper advertisement titled, "Would you like to save the world?" He joined the "very secretive, rich, and smart" initiative and came to the island eleven years ago. He was put in this station, called the Flame, the purpose of which is to communicate with the outside world. He says that everyone else in the DHARMA initiative died in a foolish attack they called "the purge" on the Others, whom they called "Hostiles". Mikhail survived by not getting involved and agreeing to a truce according to which he would stay behind a designated line. He says they weren't interested in the satellite dish because it hadn't functioned in years. He doesn't know who the hostiles are, but they were on the island for a very long time before the Initiative.

Beautiful.

As it turns out, he was pretty much full of crap, but we'll get to that later.

John Locke, functioning in full bumbling idiot-mode this week, plays some chess while Sayid figures absolutely everything out for himself. He determines that Mikhail is an Other posing as a DHARMA member, and that they need to play along because he's not alone.

That lasts for about a minute, and a struggle ensues. Mikhail gets conked and tied up, while the castaways explore the rest of the Station.

Locke, once again completely dropping the ball, ignores Mikhail and plays more chess. When he finally manages to defeat the computer, he sees more Marvin Candle video footage, concerning communication procedures. As he's trying to figure out a way to contact the outside world, Mikhail steps up and puts a knife to his throat.

In the basement, Sayid and Kate find manuals entailing just about everything we've always wanted to know about the DHARMA Initiative. Just then, Ms. Klugh shows up, gets whipped and ends up captured. This leads to a Mexican standoff upstairs, and instead of making a switch, Ms. Klugh begs Mikhail to kill her, as she refuses to give up important information. Mikhail obliges, and puts her down clean.

Afterwards, Kate, Sayid, Locke and Rousseau are hauling Mikhail away, when Locke speaks up. Feeling pretty proud of himself, he exclaims that he entered the 'Hostile Takeover' code into the computer, which means that reinforcements are on the way (he thinks). Seconds later, the Flame Station explodes, including all of the important documents within (along with their only hope of outside-world contact).

Sayid then tortures Lock with various forms of cutlery. And boy does he deserve it.

*SMASH CUT.*

This was a good episode; almost on par with the better episodes of Seasons 1 & 2. There was a lot of island mythology, more information concerning what happened to Dharma and the overall goal and history of the 'Hostiles.' Besides the unnecessary cutbacks to the beach, and ever more unnecessary dialogue from Nikki and Paulo, I would almost rank this as one of the best episodes of Season 3 thus far.

I could have done with some actual Ping-Pong footage between Sawyer and Hurley, but I'll survive. I also had a fleeting thought that they would choose Jin to play Sawyer, as I naturally assumed Jin was an amazing Ping-Pong player.

Is that racist? I'll never know.

Now, let's Break It Down!

Break It Down!

4 - I was absolutely stunned by the sheer ignorance and stupidity of John Locke this week. I was wondering what he had been up to for the last few weeks; apparently he's been huffing paint and reading Mitch Albom novels, because he turned into a stone-cold idiot.

If it weren't for the MacGyver-like brilliance of Sayid, everyone would have been killed four times over. Throw the destruction of the Flame Station into the hat, and you're left with one of biggest displays of Lost idiocy since Arzt dropped the dynamite. For shame!

8 - We're starting to see what happened in the whole Dharma vs. Hostiles feud from years back. Apparently, the Hostiles had been on the island for many years before Dharma showed up with their stupid lava lamps and Geronimo Jackson records.

Okay, that's about all we know. Oh yeah, they killed everyone in Dharma, and Dharma booby-trapped all of their stuff out of fear of them.

Oh, and Locke's an idiot.

15 - It sure looked like Mikhail was going to kill himself before turning the gun on Ms. Klugh. I fully expect Mikhail to take his own life before he 's forced to spill the beans about the genesis of the Hostiles. Typical and not very surprising, if you ask me.

16 - We did find out the origin of the cables leading into the ocean, along with the validation that the Hostiles do have a submarine. We also think that Sayid's map will lead them right into their neighborhood.

Meanwhile, Jack is eating grilled cheese sandwiches and watching the E! Channel on a constant loop.

23 - We may never know if Sayid was telling the truth about torturing Amira. I guess it really doesn't matter, but it would say something about his character and redemption. In the end, it played into whether or not Mikhail should live, but at the end of the day, the flashbacks merely served the present-day storyline, not the other way around.

Hold on, I'll think of some sort of joke to put here. Just give me a second.

Poop!

42 - What's up with Locke's fascination with entering things into a computer? Didn't he have to do that all day when he worked at the box company? You'd think he'd want a vacation.

Another week, another new episode of Lost. Tiny Spoilers Ahoy!

Episode 12 - Par Avion.

4 - Episode 12 will be titled "Par Avion," and it will be Claire-centric.

8 - "Par Avion" is French for "By plane." Just thought you might want to know.

15 - The official preview from ABC reads: "Charlie exhibits peculiar behavior when Claire has an idea that could get everyone rescued; tensions mount between Sayid and Locke as they continue their journey to rescue Jack."

16 - The flashbacks will go back to when Claire was a teenager. I expect to see a lot of yelling and slamming doors. She's kind of a brat.

23 - Jack and Claire are totally related. Everyone already knows that Christian was sleeping with Claire's mom. If you didn't already know that, now you do. Don't forget to buy a CDP t-shirt on your way out.

42 - Kate, Sayid and Locke will make it to the Hostile's camp by the end of this episode. Hopefully, they will keep Locke away from anything that has buttons on it.

Well, there you have it, another Lost Friday come and gone. Start the conversation in the comments section, and send all erotic photography to communistdance@yahoo.com. Help yourself to some CDP Merch in THE CDP WEBSTORE, and don't forget to visit our friends at The Coconut Internet when you have a minute or two.

Here are links to every Lost Friday this season. They haven't been embalmed yet, so they're starting to get a little ripe.

Season 3 Preview
Season 3 - Episode 1 Review
Season 3 - Episode 2 Review
Season 3 - Episode 3 Review
Season 3 - Episode 4 Review
Season 3 - Episode 5 Review
Season 3 - Episode 6 Review
Season 3 - Episode 7 Review
Season 3 - Episode 8 Review
Season 3 - Episode 9 Review
Season 3 - Episode 10 Review

MONDAY:
ADVENTURES IN CYBER-SEX.

Comments:
No time for photos/captions this week. Next week should see Lost Friday back in full form.
 
Did you ever catch-up on The Office?
 
You and I think so much alike that it's a little bit creepy.

When they were deciding who would play ping-pong against Sawyer, I said, loudly enough to warrant upper case letters, "PICK JIN! HE'S KOREAN, DAMN IT!"

Everybody knows that Mexicans aren't ping-pong players.

Also, I teared up a little bit when Hugo gave Sawyer his porn back. He has beer, porn, a kickass beach, and gets laid more than anyone else on the island; why would he ever want to leave?
 
MOE - I'm all caught up on The Office. I usually watch the episodes only a day or two after they air. I'm really looking forward to the continuation of the Jim/Pam/Roy storyline. That was pretty rad, if I may say so myself.

IMS - Yup, I thought for sure that Jin was going to smoke Sawyer on the table. Of course, I forgot about Hurley's mental institution stay. Everyone knows that playing ping-pong is the only fun thing to do in an institution, besides throwing drinking fountains through windows.

Sawyer made it very clear in the past that he has no reason to leave the island. He's a wanted con man with no family or home. On the island, he has Kate, 30-year-old beer and a stack of Playpen's.
 
Not much to add to the Jin theory other than that I thought the writers WANTED us to think Jin was the guy because Sun was translating for him. I assumed she was saying, "Take him out." - It never occurred to me that I was racist. I guess this explains my hatred for pandas...
 
Is it racist to assume positive things about specific races? Isn't that more of a reverse-racism?

Asians are good at ping-pong and math, and us white guys know how to balance a checkbook and decipher the Nickel Defense.

I really shouldn't be the one making decisions about this. Never mind.
 
Wonderful recap, as usual!

I questioned whether Sayid actually tortured her or not too, but I think everyone is on the boat that he actually did. I was wondering if Lost was trying to make a political statement for a while there.

Anyway, I have to go get my haar did, but I just wanted to let you know that Lost Friday is awesome, like it always is!
 
Supa' dupa' fly! Thanks for the kind words.

Yeah, judging my his emotion, it would appear that Sayid actually did torture her. After all, he tortured Nadia, right? In fact, I think that was the whole point.

I'm listening to Neon Bible through my headphones right now, and it's destructively beautiful.
 
A good friend of mine is a huge Arcade Fire fan. Guess I'll have to check 'em oot now that I've gotten two positive reviews for it...
 
besides throwing drinking fountains through windows.


Nice Ken Kesey refernce there, CDP.

I have to say, this recap almost makes me want to start watching Lost again. Almost.

And your intro rant? GOlden.
 
Neon Bible is an album for people who thought that Funeral was too scattershot or not fully conceptualized. This is the album where Arcade Fire comes together as a serious cohesive unit and really finds a significant voice for themselves. Beautiful production, better instrumentation and a larger theme make this album truly beautiful.

The critics are trying very hard not to compare it to Funeral, which is a good idea. Funeral is very much a 'moment in time' album, whereas Neon Bible is just an amazingly solid effort at any point in time.

I'm impressed; far more than I thought I'd be. When the pipe organ blasts in on 'Intervention' and 'My Body Is A Cage' I damn near started tearing up. It's just such a huge and powerful sound.

Okay, I'm done. Sorry.

I'm just excited because I think my wife is going to honestly like this album. They maintain their sound, while changing up a few of the things she didn't like about them (more instrumentation, good production, serious depth, etc.).
 
Thanks, JT. Lost is in a pretty decent place right now, but you can always just stick to Lost Friday if you're on the fence.

My opening rant needed to be done. It was cleansing and a reminder of the posts I've been putting off for awhile. I need to get back to ranting; I'm somewhat gifted at it.
 
After LOST Wednesday's, LOST Friday is the highlight of my week.

I enjoy it very much!
 
I will not like them until they actually develop their parts, rather than just laying them on thick. It's not about HOW MANY parts, but about the QUALITY. (see matt pond PA for further information)

I liked this episode--it kept me captivated. What a shame the numbers are tanking faster than...I don't know. I'm not good at these clever analogies. I'll leave those to the CDP.
 
Thanks a lot, Francesca and Noah. Don't be a stranger!
 
Hathery, on the new album, the layering is slightly tuned down and the creativity is slightly tuned up. They give their orchestral parts a little more time to breathe and do their thing.

You may actually think that this albums puts Funeral to shame, and I think in a lot of ways, it makes sense.

At the end of the day, however, it's best to enjoy the overall product instead of nitpicking about certain repetitive parts.
 
CDP, Congrats on living in the most walkable city in the US!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17522269/
 
Madison is ripe with pedestrians. I nearly hit 15 with my car every day.

I'm not nitpicking about the Arcade Pweep, hon. I'm just speaking the truth. I prefer to listen to music that I don't feel like I could have written...but I will still give this album a go. We will never agree on funeral, though.
 
JT - Madison is a very health-conscious city, in contrast to the typical portrayal of Wisconsinites in popular culture. Madison is an awesome, progressive, culture-rich area, with a ton of beer and fat people thrown in for flavor.

I love this city, and I'm never leaving.

Me and the Missus were walking around downtown last night, and despite the bitter cold, there was nowhere else I would have rather been.

It's rad with a capital 'Awesome.'
 
The trunk is ajar...The trunk is ajar...

Thank you for another stellar (and clever) Lost recap! And you can count me among those who thought Jin was going to be chosen as Sawyer's ping pong nemesis. Not because he's, you know, Asian and all and they're supposedly good at the table tennis - I was was led astray by meaningful camera shots. And I will miss the nick names too. But they'll be back! You can't keep a smart-ass quiet forever.
As for the spoilers, I've been leaning towards the Claire/Jack revelation for a while. Although...it would be a totally different dynamic if it turned out that Jack and Kate were brother and sister, wouldn't it?
 
Thanks for the kind words, Maus.

Well, let's put it this way. Christian Shepard got someone pregnant that was not Mrs. Shepard. I'm pretty sure that we saw a blurry image of him in the last Claire flash back episode, but I guess we'll find out for sure on Wednesday.

I bet Jin really is good at ping-pong. In fact, just the thought that I might get to see him and Sun play each other one day makes me very happy.
 
It's rad with a capital 'Awesome.'

That is the best thing I've heard all day. Count on me using that phrase this weekend.
 
Rad! Awesome!
 
Maybe I'm alone in this, but I still think the Others are what's left of Dharma. Only the four-toed statue foot knows why.

If the Others aren't, then why would they need Juliet, Jack's star-crossed zoo keeper? I assume that Patch was lying about the "the purge"--a very Russian thing for a Russian to say--and Dharma fell apart for another reason.

Here's my unsupported-by-any-facts guess (as guesses are wont to be): Dharma was into some heavy Dr. Moreau creepiness, geneticically modifying humans just to piss off Jerry Falwell. The subjects got tired of walking on two legs, not on four and wiped out the original Dharma folks.

Juliet, an expert in impregnating male rats and cancerous sisters, is needed to keep producing Little Bens.

Or not.
 
I agree...I really don't buy that the Others and the Dharma folks are different people. It is possible that the Dharma Initiative never existed, and it was fraudently conconted to keep the captives on the island busy with Scooby Doo-like intrigue, while the Others experiment on them and kill them off one by one.
 
Those are good theories.

In my own personal opinion, based on the shambles of the Dharma Initiative alone, the Hostiles are not the same folks who started that group. The Hostiles are part of a race that existed back to when the 4-toed statue was built, and the poor Dharma folk just happened to tread on the wrong island. Much like the castaways themselves.

Just an opinion.
 
I bet Juliet only has 4 toes...and they're probably webbed, too.

My understanding of the statue was that it was trying to show how uncivilized those folks were, just like the huts they were pretending to live in. It was a facade to make the castaways think they were like island-folk or something, when really they're a bunch of scientists. I don't know.
 
Remember when Sawyer bragged about learning the steps necessary to get a fish biscuit and Zeke (is that the name of the guy who wore the fake beard?) said something like, "It only took the bears two hours"?

Sounds to me like Zeke was around when the dharma experiment was active. How else would he know that about the bears?

And if it's a race of Islanders, where are the really old people? Certainly there would be some "village elders," no?
 
Hey, shouldn't you have had six lights on? Low Washer Fluid is usually the first one that comes on in my truck. I demand a recount!

When I was watching the ping pong challenge I was hoping Hurley was going to step up. When they started doing the fancy camera lead ups on Jin I thought "Way to play up the stereotype guys" I really didn't think a fisherman's son would have had too much time to master the game if you ask me. We'll just leave him to beating the crap out of people and taking their puppies.

I don't think all the Dharma people were killed. Some of them must have been integrated into The Others society. That would explain the knowledge transfer.

Oh man! The flame station was a gold mine! They barely caught a glimpse of the mythiness that place could have provided. Stupid Locke! stupid stupid Locke!

"You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"

And Sayyid is my candidate for Man of the Year. He's handy, good with electronics, excellent torturer, and can make a mean creme brulee!
 
LOTT - Good point, where are all the old people? Maybe it's like a Logan's Run type of thing here.

Yeah, I suppose Dharma isn't entirely dead; that would actually be sort of silly on the part of the writers.

BLUSTACON - My car doesn't have a 'washer fluid' light on it. You must have one of those fancy-ass trucks or something. 1997 Ford Escorts weren't usually equipped with all the bells and whistles. They didn't even give me seat belts; just some rope and bungee cord.

Locke = New island idiot.
Sayid = The freaking man.
 
Gotta love a Ford! I have a '98 Ford Earth Destroyer or Expididdy as we call it here. 'sup. (BTW I assuage my guilt over the poor gas milage by having a ridiculously short commute and using it to tow all manner of things to our ISWMF with my cool 4x8 trailer)
So it has a brake fluid light, but no washer fluid light. interesting.
 
The 'brake' light serves a dual function, as it's the same light that turns on when the Emergency Brake is in use.

For the record, I wasn't driving around with my trunk open. Would have been funny, though.
 
Funny yes, like watching people muscle things they shouldn't be buying into their cars at Home Depot.

Congrats on breaking 70 grand.
 
70,000 hits. Rad.

If I may toot my own horn for a bit, SiteMeter doesn't count multiple hits from individual computers as single 'hits,' so my actual Hit Count is somewhere near 165,000, last time I checked.

The 70,000 number essentially means 70,000 different computers, which is equally awesome.

To celebrate, I will buy a car that doesn't completely suck.
 
Try the Dharma Minibus. It can spend thirty years on its side in the jungle and still start after a moderate thirty mile an hour hellride down a hillside.
 
Oh, I'd buy one of those, but they're only available in very remote locations.

Like secret islands. Or Fond Du Lac.
 
Speaking of Home Depot, I'm helping a friend build a deck. We needed to get 2 2x10x12's to complete the stringers for his stairs, and there was a huge line at the contractor's checkout, where you normally check out with lumber.

We went through the self-checkout line with them, carrying them by hand. We got 2 angry looks, a lot of laughs, and out of there in about 1/3 of the time it would have taken if we hadn't been jackasses.
 
As far as I'm concerned, the self-checkout is there for a reason. Good on you!

Wisconsin v. Ohio State today, for the Big 10 Championship. The rubber match, baby!

Did everyone remember to spring forward?
 
I love your site CDP, but if tomorrow's post ends with a future appearance on Dateline you can count me out.
 
I'd expect nothing less, Blustacon.

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. It's quite funny, if I may say so myself. A return to my 'humorous essay' roots, if you will.
 
I'm working on similar myself, but am too drunk to commit to much. Viva la porno!
 
Whatever you do, please don't Drink & Blog.

Think of the children.
 
Yeah, I started a post last night after spending most of the day drinking on my buddy's newly constructed deck. When I read over it this morning, it made less than zero sense.

I may post it in the future as an example of why drinking and blogging = bad.
 

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