Tuesday, July 3

Cultural Diversity Is Unoriginal.

Fall Down Go Boom.

On Saturday, the Missus and I (along with Ben and Sherry) headed out to the lakeside terrace in downtown Madison to see Rhythm & Booms, the largest fireworks show in the state. The Missus really wanted to go this year, as we had missed out for 4 straight years due to one strange circumstance after another (got lost, got lost, forgot & got lost, respectively).

As we hit the lakeshore, I was instantly surrounded by 10,000 people...er...individuals.

One woman was skipping around, rocking Birkenstocks and playing an African drum. Another group of folks was* playing bocce ball (in amongst a massive group of roving people in the dark, mind you). Others were staggering drunk, others reeked of weed and still more thought they were doing everyone a favor by gracing us with their singing voice. I didn't get bitten by any mosquitoes, presumably because they were so annoyed that they left.

(*Grammatically correct. Yup.)

You know, the problem with cultural diversity is that it's so...unoriginal. Also, notice how I already structured a sentence in this post the exact same way as the last one. Isn't that lazy? Isn't that stale and predictable? Well, so were these people. Lately, I've become so bored and disappointed by seemingly intelligent people that I could spit. In fact, I just did spit, but most of it hit my shoe. What looked like a Utopia on Saturday night, to me, looked like a bunch of people trying too hard.

Clearly, there's something wrong with me. Normal people don't think that way.

I also find it interesting that after 1,000 years of evolution, human innovation, entire civilizations rising and collapsing, we still look to the skies year after year to watch things blow up. Regardless of where we go as a race, I doubt we'll ever get tired of fireworks. The spectacle of putting flame to colored gunpowder has lasted longer than Aerosmith and The Simpsons combined. The show was beautiful, however, and I managed to leave without taking a swing at anyone.

Heading home and feeling less than ready for bed, my friends bought a $30 assortment of fireworks with the intention of setting them ablaze in my driveway. The Missus, in a rare moment of adventure and carefree thinking, convinced me that the fireworks wouldn't make any noise (you know, those silent fireworks that everyone talks about) and the cops would not drag me down to the station for creating a noise disturbance at 11:30pm.

I agreed and went along.

For the next half hour, we lit things on fire, woke up hundreds of elderly neighbors, ran from cars and stared directly into blinding light. I was acting 10 years younger and 20 years dumber, and quite frankly, enjoyed the hell out of it. The four of us were falling about the driveway, knowing full well that had any teenagers pulled the same stunt, we would have come out and beat them within an inch of their collective lives.

It was ridiculous, but it was what I needed. Just because humans evolve, try too hard to be cultural, don't try hard enough...whatever; it doesn't mean you can't just have fun every now and again. At the end of the day, the only person trying too hard to appear significant is the person who's criticizing all of the individuals.

That person is me; I'm an asshole and I'm sorry. I know better now, although I tend to forget constantly.

Other highlights from my weekend include watching Sicko at the new Sundance 608 Cinema (a great theater and a fantastic film), spending an evening in the delightfully posh and serene Hilldale Mall area, acquiring no less than 400 vinyl albums from my uncle (which I plan to digitally archive for the purposes of awesomeness), and celebrating my cousin's High School graduation (she's coming to Madison for college; I look forward to having her visit). The weather was atypically beautiful for Wisconsin standards, and I even tanned a little bit, considering that I was born with no pigment whatsoever.

The perfect weekend?

No chance; it was way too...unoriginal.

You forget to mention the smiley face firework.
At the end of the day, the only person trying too hard to appear significant is the person who's criticizing all of the individuals.

It's the same way I feel every Tuesday night when I'm making fun of the drunk underage kids at the bar for dollar beer night.

Also - how do you digitally archive vinyl? I have a few pretty rare albums I would love to have backups of.
This comment has been removed by the author.
This comment has been removed by the author.
I bought a turntable with a USB hookup and Audacity software. I haven't used it yet, but I'll let you know when I do. Essentially, you need a USB turntable, or a similar hookup.
I had no idea they made those, but I need one. NOW.
At the end of the day, the only person trying too hard to appear significant is the person who's criticizing all of the individuals.

Someone's been reading The Catcher in the Rye...
That quote was 100% me. I haven't read Catcher in 10 years.

It is a good quote though, ain't it?

JT, here's some information on the turntable I bought:

I want to once again encourage everyone to click on the Blogger's Choice Awards links at the bottom of the sidebar and vote for the CDP.

After several months of voting (and only a couple of more to go), the CDP is holding strong with the elite of the Internets. Here are the current standings for the categories I'm nominated for:

Best Humor Blog:
Ranked #12 out of 954 blogs.

Best Pop Culture Blog:
Ranked #10 out of 630 blogs.

Best Blog About Stuff:
Ranked #5 out of 1836 blogs.

Not bad, but we can do better. Thanks in advance; I'll turn this into a main page post in the near future.
Well, Holden ends up in a mental hospital so you better watch how far you let the cynicism go.

Way 2 go, boie, on the Blogger's Choice :)
Cynicism is just jealousy with better comedic timing. I'm aware of this, so it'll keep the crazies at bay.

Feel free to use that quote at will. Man, I'm just GIVING 'em away today!
You are ON A ROLL!
You made it on Isthmus again. This time they didn't spell your sitename wrong, though, because they opted for your real name instead.
I'll allow it!
I'm being extremely lazy/uncreative today, so here's all I've got: have a great 4th/Independence Day/Wednesday off.

Unless you don't have tomorrow off, which sucks.
I hear you; same to you.

I'll be working on my book, methinks. Or listening to all of that vinyl. Whatever's easiest.

Or both.

I'm just going to shut up now.
I'll probably be watching birds out the window like a crazy old person. That's what I'm into now.
the vinyl records alone would make me pee my pants from excitement. what sort of treasures did you find in the collection?
I will be putting up many a photo by the end of the week. There are some amazing (good and bad) things in this collection.

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