Friday, November 2

Six Months & 298 Pages Later...

65 Poor Life Decisions.

Keep your ear to the street, friends. The book is done.

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First post!!

Congratulations on finishing the book! Isn't it a great feeling to have a big project accomplished? Was it fun to go through and edit your older posts?

I'm also curious to know if there were any great posts that didn't make it into the book because they didn't feel right, etc. Editing is harsh mistress.

I feel that my writing has gradually improved since blogging. I can't stand reading posts from 18 months ago because I see so many spelling errors, bad sentences, etc. And I'll probably feel the same about the stuff I'm posting now in 18 months.

Once again - congrats CDP!

And congrats to Hathery because she lived through the editing process!
There, I deleted my pointless comment so you can officially have the first comment :)
Dumb question. Is that the title you chose?

Can't wait to see the finished product.
Congratz buddy!
I'll try to answer as many questions as possible about the book in the upcoming weeks. As of right now, I don't know when the release date is, so don't bother asking that for awhile.

1. Yes, 65 Poor Life Decisions is the title of the book. Other working titles included Prepare For Failure, Dress Formally From The Waist Up and 70 Poor Life Decisions (before I cut 5 additional essays at zero hour).

It just made the most sense, corresponded to the way the book was layed out, and went along best with my typical style. Hope you like it.

2. Although I feel as if a great weight has been lifted from me with the completion of the book, I still have a ton of work left to do. Self-publishing means self-promotion, and I have money to spend, palms to grease and an all-out marketing assault to mastermind.

This, however, is going to be the fun part.

3. Was it fun to go back and edit my older posts? In a word, no. In two words, hell no. Like you said, it's amazing how much I sucked in 2004, considering it wasn't all that long ago. When all you want to do is write new stuff, focusing on the old stuff with a fine-toothed comb is nothing short of torture. I can assure you that I will never read the paper copy of the book.

4. Yeah, a lot of posts missed the cut for one reason or another. You have to remember that I had to take 1800 pages and 650 essays, and cut them down to 298 and 65, respectively. That's an enormous amount of cutting-room floor material.

Although it didn't make sense to put any Lost Friday posts in the book, I feel like I might want to publish all of those once the show comes to a close. Full-color, captions included and whatnot; that might be a lot of fun.

5. The Missus came through in the clutch and literally saved the book from being completely deleted. Seriously, self-editing this many pages of crap you've already read a billion times is a terrible, terrible experience. I cannot tell you how happy I am to be done with it, and how excited I am to get this baby ready for purchase.

This has, without question, been one of the most organic, difficult and worthwhile things I have ever done. I really hope that everyone enjoys it, and I can't wait to start on a book of brand-new essays.

I'll show you the front cover next week.
Wow, I envy your ability to get shit done. I can't wait to see what essays you've got in there!
Thank you! Once I realized that superficial goals and other various crap were getting in between me and what I really needed to do, I just buckled down and saw it through. These things don't happen to me often, so I embraced it and worked my ass of.

I want to remind everyone that there's a lot more to the book than CDP essays. I've added brand new introductions to every essay, thrown in a foreword, epilogue and all of the other stuff that makes a book...a book.

I wanted to make it a little bit more than my blog. The way it's layed out is through different chaptered groups of essays, starting back in school and working around into adulthood. It's not chronological as to when it was posted on the CDP, or even when it specifically happened in my life. It just flows in the best way that works, and I like how that turned out.
It's gonna be good times, people. GOOD TIMES! I, for one, am never reading it as I have already read the damn thing 8 times now. haha.
We're not good promoters.
That is a damn good title, which actually could be the subtitle to my autobiography, edited slightly to include one good decision. I look forward to reading.
I must say that it's a bit misleading. There are a few essays in there that don't necessarily constitute a 'poor life decision,' it's just that 'I'm Fu**ing Cursed' didn't seem very bookstore-friendly.
Congratulations on finishing your book! Let's rejoice!

Thank you, but let's try to keep it civil in here, okay? You almost derailed the train of maturity and good taste with your childish outburst.

You're out of the Finer Things Club.

Seriously though, thanks. We're so close to the finish line that I can taste it, and it has the tangy flavor of recycled paper.
Ironically, one friends just finished his first book as well. Instead of being a bunch of posts from his blog he did it on making web sites accessible for everyone, despite their abilities to see, hear, move the mouse, etc. And he has a real book deal, though he will probably never make money on it. And I read a few of the first drafts. It was cool to see the book evolve, but I'm glad I wasn't in the midst of the changes (I just suggested them!)

His experience is like yours -- and he had an editor! He says he will never do it again but I think he will.

But don't rest on your laurels yet! Not until you hold the book in your own hands!
"Other than having sex with men, I'd say the Finer Things Club is the gayest thing I do."

"Jim, what are you doing here?"
"First off, Hi."
"Is that a fake moustache?"

This is going to be so awesome.

Since I started reading theCDP, about a year ago, it's really helped me. I've stolen jokes, ideas, and views. Once, I had a huge English essay to do, and acually went on theCDP so I could widen my vocabulary.

I got a 6.5 and moved up a set.

I really cannot wait for this book. It will be my Bible.
HOSS- Good for your friend; it's quite the experience. I also don't expect to see a huge payday, but the goal is to allow this to open future doors. I have had a long-term plan in action since 2004 (right on schedule), although the Missus prefers instant gratification and is less than patient.

Watching the book evolve from essentially nothing to what I looked at last night was amazing. It's a completely different life form than what it previously was. Anyone who thinks it's easy to slap some previously-written things into a book is a freaking idiot.

Michael's complete disgust for Toby is consistently hilarious.

...and Dwight's moustache? I almost stood up and applauded it.
Thanks, Carrot Duff!

I really like the idea of people stealing jokes and opinions from me. I remember having a rather icky argument with the Missus many years ago, where she accused me of having absolutely nothing originally funny to say; claiming that I stole all of my jokes, ideas and quotes from others. I think she might have actually called me Robin Williams.

Robin Williams!

Today, people are using my material to pass English class. British English. How cool is that?
If I called you Robin Williams, that is absolutely hilarious. No one amuses me more than myself.
Maybe I called myself Robin Williams. That doesn't sound like something you'd say.

Either way, you're totally wrong. One of the problems with being married to me is that you sometimes forget how absolutely hilarious I am.

I haven't seen last night's episode of The Office I think we're officially even.

Will the next book be titled 65 MORE Poor Life Decisions?
Indeed. I can't prevent spoilers on here, so I don't even try.

I honestly thought about giving that title to the next book, yes. From my early projections, the next book will be more of a 'book' book; an original collection of non-CDP stories that focus more on childhood and teenage elements of my life.

So, what does that mean for the future of the CDP? Your guess is as good as mine.
You're going to turn the CDP into a nude photo-gallery aren't you...aren't you!
Yes, and much like the mix-tape trade, I'll be accepting any and all reader submissions.
...and subsoquently NOT reviewing any of them.


Have an awesome weekend and congratulations on the book!
Congrats! I've always considered doing something similar with my old site, the slack ( but it goes back to 1997 and I shudder to think the crappiness that awaits me there.
We need some sort of CDP street team.
MOE- Thanks Moe! I know I never 'officially' reviewed those mixes, but hey, you never know. I might have time once the book this is taken care of.

SLACKMISTRESS- Thank you! I didn't realize how hard it would be to go back and make all the old stuff awesome again. It was worth it, but I'm seriously never doing it again (okay, maybe with Lost Friday, but that's it).

JT- Absolutely. I'll print up a flier (similar to the one at the top of this post), and I'll make it available for folks to print out themselves and do as they wish. Every little bit helps a whole lot. GREAT idea.
Well, for those of us who live in college towns, there are those small indie bookstores around campus...
I don't even think my friends know what Communist means...

Which is why I have you guys!
Tell 'em it means "hilarious".
JT (and everyone else, really), I'll be launching a promotional blitz as soon as I figure out when the book can be released worldwide. This will include:

Banner ads for your blog.
Promotional printings to distribute downtown or to friends.
Talks with tons of indie bookstores all over the nation.
Interviews/reviews/appearances locally.

I want to find the best way to get word of the book out without being annoying and asking too much from people. If you're super-nice, all I'd really want is for folks to maybe put a little banner on their page and maybe tell some friends about it. Trust me, I'll let everyone know when the time is right.
And maybe just a small, discreet tattoo on your forehead directing people to That's all. haha.

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