Wednesday, July 16

The CDP Dark Knight Giveaway!


This Friday, Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight will finally premiere to a worldwide audience.

I've been waiting all year for this (and a good chunk of last year as well), and my IMAX tickets are secured as we speak. Nolan is my favorite current director, and arguably one of the greatest living directors on the planet. This film has all the makings to be the greatest superhero film of all-time, shatter records posted by the abysmal Spider-Man franchise, and even snag Heath Ledger a posthumous Oscar nod. Not too bad for a Batman franchise that was all but dead in the water about a decade ago. I cannot recall the last time I've been so hyped for a film, and the universal acclaim for this picture has all but increased my desire for Friday to arrive. It almost feels like Christmas to me.

Now, thanks to CDP Network alumni (and Warner Brothers employee), Reese, I've been hooked up with an armload of Dark Knight theatrical posters to give away to CDP readers (so remember to shoot her a thank you if you're one of the chosen winners).

The posters are theatrical-size; 27 by 40 inches with the reverse image printed on the back. They are in perfect condition and will be shipped out as delicately as if I were shipping a fetus cross-country. How you wind up receiving one of these beauties is another story altogether.


The contest to win a poster of your choosing (any of the four options displayed in this post) is really quite simple. All you have to do is come up with a new Tagline for the CDP.

For four-and-a-half years now, the official slogan of the CDP (as displayed in the copyright area in the sidebar) has been 'Jumping The Shark Since 2004.' I feel as if this slogan has run its course, and the time for something new is now. I'm asking the CDP faithful to come up with a new piece of history, and for it you will be handsomely rewarded.

Be creative, be funny, be in tune with the spirit of the page. Anything goes.


You may submit as many new taglines as you want, either via the Comments section or through my e-mail address at The contest begins today and will run through to Tuesday, July 22. The winners will be announced on Wednesday the 23rd.

First Prize will receive two (2) Dark Knight theatrical posters, and places second through fifth will each receive one (1). Shipping is on me. Simple as that. Five people will win!


So, get to it. Create the next new tagline for the Communist Dance Party, and score yourself some awesome Dark Knight swag in the process. You really can't go wrong. Sound off in the comments section and enjoy your day.

Comments: 1 – 200 of 217 Newer› Newest»
How awesome!!
My taglines and whatnot are usually kind of random and hardly ever make any sense to other people, so this will require some creative thinking on my part...

Can't. Take. The pressure.

(Biff! Pow!)
OMG, geekgasm.

Okay, as a marketer, I feel obligated to ask one question: from a branding point of you moving forward, do you see this space as "Communist Dance Party" or CDP?

Sorry to get all technical, but I reeeally wanna win.
Branding point of you? what?

Point of view. Duh. Kate hates everything (except for Batman posters) prior to 10am.
As a general rule, I refer to my site as the CDP, but I use the term 'Communist Dance Party' when I have to be serious. Sort of like when you call a child by their middle name when they're in trouble.

As far as the tagline goes, and you can see this in the sidebar, the slogan will be prefaced by the 'Copyright 2004-2008: Communist Dance Party' line.

Truth be told, however, you can do whatever you want. Feel free to ask any other questions.
HOLY CRAP, look at the current track listing for Rock Band 2. I haven't looked at it since 'Everlong' was announced (I'll pay $250 for that song alone), but this is probably the coolest roster yet.

Bikini Kill! Beck! 'Eye Of The Tiger!' 'Float On!' The Muffs! 'Where'd You Go' by the Bosstones, marking the first ska song I've ever seen in one of these games!

And holy christ, let us not forget 'Alex Chilton' by the Replacements. Wow.

So the real question is, who will have the stones to step up and be the first person to submit an entry?
Eek! I have a few, but I think they need to marinate, like a fine wine. Er, you get the idea.

Now how do you spell wahzoo? ;)
Yeah, what rhymes with 'miserable failure?'

Fishing pole tailor?
Visible mailer?
This tastes staler?
Visit her trailer?
Missus will nail her?
No stones here.

Nice giveaway idea! ::applause:: Thanks for your enthusiasm and talking up the movie. I'll be seeing Mamma Mia...

And, for the record, technically it's Warner Bros. But hey, a shout-out is a shout-out :)
Where's the Holy
Popeye the Sailor?
Aww, of course it's 'Bros.' Why did I say 'Brothers?' Sorry about that.

Like I've said before, I have an interest to see this movie shatter records worldwide. Anything I can do to remind people that Christopher Nolan is amazing is time well spent.

And thank you for making it possible. Hopefully it'll spawn some decent taglines and whatnot.
I guess I'll be first? Thanks guys...

"Seeing your butthole since 2004".

There. I got the worst - and most obvious - offering out of the way early. Although one of those posters would totally look awesome in my son's room. With the added bonus of possibly inspring night terrors. So - back to the drawing board for me...
Also, "miserable failure" rhymes with "hay straw baler".

And "vampires are paler".
I figured someone was going to do a 'butthole' reference, and I'm glad that you stepped up and took care of it right off the bat. Remember that you can enter as many times as you want!
Since 2004, CDP's been your whore.

That's all I got for right now. Everything else I thought of was a lot lamer, if you can believe.
There will be absolutely no rhyming, despite that comment's perfect timing.
"No more rhyming now, I mean it."

"...Anybody want a peanut?"
This is the only blog I know of where the comments section randomly breaks out into Haiku and song at the drop of a hat. I have the most intelligent readers.

Friday: The Dark Knight.
You, me and an IMAX screen.
Together, we'll pee.

And movie quotes!

I think your tagline should be a haiku.
I really don't know what I'm looking for, but I'll know it when I see it. Really, just be creative and throw everything against the wall to see what sticks. Haikus, whatever, provided it's not entirely filthy and isn't any longer than a typical sentence.
Not to be a total dork, but in the world of marketing, they say a tagline or subject line should not exceed 50 characters.

Then again, rules are meant to be broken.

"The Wittiest Party in Wisconsin"
"Because I'm More Interesting Than Your Friends"
"Rocking Pop Culture since 2004"
"Pop Culture Out the Wahzoo"
"Surprisingly still aloud on the Internet"
"You know you want it."
Dude, where's the love to the guy who sent Reese to your blog in the first place? If she's a CDP Network Alum I want to be an adjunct faculty member.
WILL - You're totally in the CDP Network! I've had you linked over there for ages now. I also had no idea you referred Reese to me; good lookin' out, money.

KATE - Right, 10 words or less is optimal, but I didn't want to turn people off from writing something a little outside the box.

HILBELINK - Are you using clever wordplay on 'aloud,' or did you really mean 'allowed?'

We're off to a good start! Also, remember that the contest runs all week to next Tuesday.
"Bringin' sexy back." Or geeky or nerdy
I totally used clever word play. Sock it to me.
The CDP ...

Go Ugly, Early.
Rock Out, With Your Pop Culture Out.
Disease-Free Since 2004

The first option was inspired by movie dialogue, I will be honest. But it's a motto I live my life by, day to day.
All hail, Will!
He indeed got me to theCDP with a simple Tweet.
xo, Will :)
Rock Out, With Your Pop Culture Out

The gloves are off now.
Thank you. I work harder at promoting this blog than I do my own. There's a tagline..."As seen on"

or "as insulted on the The betheboy/slackmistress chat"
"Now disease free!"
"A product of the public school system."
WILL - "One of Will's 3,000 favorite blogs."

Dammit, we weren't supposed to talk about that anymore. It is a pretty funny tagline, though.

"As seen on To Catch A Predator."

It's a shame I came up with that one, because had someone else done it, it probably would have won.
From Teh Wikipediaz:

Over a week before the "the highly-anticipated release of The Dark Knight," according to IGN, the ticket service Fandango reported that "many of its pre-opening Thursday midnight shows on July 17 are already sold out in cities across the [United States], from New York to Boise, Idaho" and that "Theaters continue to add 3:00 a.m. and 6:00 a.m. showtimes to meet the ticketing demand."

According to a press release of July 10, 2008, by eMediaWorld, IMAX Corporation, and Warner Bros., The Dark Knight: The IMAX Experience will be opening in the U.S. "in a record 94 IMAX theatres domestically on July 18th in conjunction with the film's wide release," with at least 23 additional international locations opening in the following weeks"; moreover, U.S. ticket pre-sales have "surpassed $2 million, more than a week prior to opening", with "over 100 shows already sold out", and some U.S. IMAX theatres plan to screen The Dark Knight: The IMAX Experience "non-stop for 24 hours to meet the high moviegoer demands."
"Dodging Chris Hansen since 2004"

"I'm Big Time Stuff You Know"
"The Place That Gives You Taste"
"Dissected Pop Culture. Interneted in Wisconsin."
"Proof One Bad Joke Deserves Another"
"Taste the Pop Culture Value"

I think I'm falling off the funny cliff as opposed to climbing; my apologies. Oh well, parachute away.
The funniest blog in a three-block radius.

Your New Mancrush.

Attending Duke Since 2004.

The best blog on the Internet, according to my moms.

The's tagline was "you know you want it" back in 1998 but perhaps that's considered vintage now...
I can't believe that my own mother just made a pedophile joke about me. That's...really funny.

KATE - Well, it's not necessarily supposed to be a CDP roast after all; it's supposed to be a somewhat-positive, definately hilarious, and vaguely descriptive way to draw new or returning CDP fans. The way I see it, you're on the right track. Who would want to go to a page that proclaims that it sucks?

SLACKMISTRESS - I suppose 'The Internet's Boyfriend' is already a registered trademark of Betheboy Industries? I always got a kick out of that term.
"Keeping the internet classy since 2004"?

"The Desmond's beard of blogs"?
"I gots more jokes than Mr. Eko quotes scripture, more Pop Culture than a Tarantino picture. Boss like Bruce Springsteen with a red hat in my pocket, bitches coast-to-coast got my picture in they lockets."

Little CDP Freestyle for you. Fr-fr-free-freestylin'. Just saying what comes to the t-t-t-top of my head.

I'm an idiot.
Continuing the Chris Hansen theme.

The CDP ~ What are you doing here?
Ya know - this is harder than it should be and I'm spending too much time pondering clever ways to incorporate certain things into my submissions. I never take this much time on my own taglines. Of course, my recent one is to clarify that I don't blog about American Idol...

Maybe at one point your tagline should have been "WAAAAAALLLLT".
The CDP ~ Communist Dance Popculture
The CDP ~ Veganizing Wisconsin since 2004
I don't know how many of you were around for the 2004-2006 version of the CDP, but in those days, I'd have a tagline right at the top of the page that I changed with every new post. I must have cranked out 400 of those things.

"Why don't you have a seat over there and answer a few questions for me?" I hope to God that they bring that back for Sweeps, because it was my and the Missus' absolute favorite thing to watch.

Communist Dance Popculture? Yeah, maybe we should just completely change what the letters stand for.

Crap Dung Poop.
"The CDP - Showing its tip since 2004."

"The CDP - Showing you mine even if you won't show me yours since 2004."

"The CDP - Popping culture's cherry since 2004."
Yeah, you could build a mini-database and have a different tagline with every refresh...

Also I must admit I'm fairly new to this shindig, but Communist Dance Party is a pretty memorable title and what had me originally return to the site. May turn some people off, but maybe that's a good litmus test?
EMILY - I can't not hear a 'tip' reference without chuckling. It's just so absurd I can't help but laugh.

I also like that, despite the fact that I've written maybe one or two stories total that contain some sort of nudity, that my name is somehow synonymous with it. Perhaps it's a refraction of my prudish nature.

Also, I obvbiously can't show favoritism to any tagline suggestions until the contest is over, but 'Popping Culture's Cherry' was very clever, albiet entirely unusable and filthy.

KATE - One-liners are tough to come up with after a few years. I use most of them now for my Facebook status.

Oh yeah, I'm never changing the name of the site; Communist Dance Party is a total winner. And like you said, it (hopefully) gets people in the mood for what to expect; humor, a little pop culture, some entertainment, absurdity and tastefully edgy on-goings. When it started, I covered more politics, but I soon realized that people don't find that crap funny.

Also, everyone asks me where the title came from, and the truth is that it sort of appeared in my brain and stuck. Here's my 'official' answer from the Wisconsin State Journal interview I did last year:

"I just thought it was funny. I do this thing around the house where I just string words together that I think are funny. It annoys the hell out of my wife and I think it's a riot."
"CDP - Making the parents of teenage girls uncomfortable since 2004"

"The CDP - Show us on the doll"
"Show us on the doll" ~ CLASSIC.
Other than hanging out with teenage CDP fans on an almost-daily basis, I see absolutely no reason why I get the pedophile comparisons.

'Show us on the doll.' Lulz.

This is becoming like the TV joke-writing sessions that everyone knows will be shot down by Standards & Practices, but everyone keeps doing it to just crack the other writers up.
"The CDP - Show us on the doll"

It took me a minute, but now I see...what you did there *cueing squinty owl image*

"The CDP - More Chris Hansen references than a To Catch a Predator marathon"
The CDP - Showing its tip since 2004."

Give that woman the prize! beh heh heh.
It's factually inaccurate; I've been showing my tip since way earlier than 2004.
You were great on the Nickelodeon show "The Adventures of Pete and Pedo"
'Popping Culture's Cherry' was very clever, albiet entirely unusable and filthy.

Yeah, I thought of that, but it was too good not to enter. Let the squeamish eat cake, I say!

A few more:

"The CDP - Awkward slow dances with pop culture since 2004."

"The CDP - Rated most handsome by moms everywhere."

"The CDP - Nostalgia for ten years ago since 2004."
No Communists were harmed in the making of this Blog...
...but plenty of dance parties were.
"The CDP - Nostalgia for ten years ago since 2004."

WILL - Instead of a tattoo of Petunia, I had a tattoo of Lolita.

One of these days, I'll come home on a beautiful Autumn day to find Polaris or Miracle Legion playing on my front lawn. Someday...

EMILY - How about 'Awkward slow dances with moms everywhere since 2004?' That's my kinda talk.
How about just "Awkward slow dances with your mom since 2004" - y'know, to make it classy.
How about, "Nailing your mom since 2004?"
The taglines that are too dirty for the internets should be made into CDP t-shirts. Hilarity + free promotion = more CDPeons
Designing all-new CDP merch has been on the back-burner all year; perhaps this will be the push that gets me going on it. Good idea!

I'm going to try to talk the Missus into doing it for me, though.
Cafe Press is so easy a man could do it ;)
The Missus tells me that Zazzle is the wave of the future, however. She's more familiar with that site than I am, so I think we're going to have a meeting about it tonight in the CDP Conference Room.

aka: Linen Closet.

The CDP -

"Pitching a Tent with your little sister"

"Like the Family Circus minus the ghosts of dead grandparents"
@Will: Okay, I'm a hardened, a$$hole New Yorker, but those last two made me blush AND giggle. Bravo.
Will's Family Circus reference got me onto bad cartoons, and this popped into my head:

"The CDP - For better or for worse, not Canadian."
Relax, Will. You're only get one of the posters. Leave some for the rest of us, you brilliant son of a bitch.
CDP ~ Getting mixed up with Clown Doodie Porn since 2004.

CDP ~ I can't believe it's not butter!

CDP ~ Serving your favourite soft-carbonated drink since 2004.

I don't even want a poster I just like saying terrible things.
As for "You know you want it," CDP said that to me about 10 years ago when we first met, so I thought it would be an appropriate phrase to bring up in public. Ha cha cha cha cha cha. :)

Carrot Duff-"I can't believe it's not butter" was actually the first thing that popped into my head, quickly followed by, "I can't believe it doesn't suck!"

CDP-Speaking of catching predators, I remember your awkward crushes on such underagers as Mary Kate and Ashley and Tara Lepinksi (sp.)

"CDP is to funny what Boca Burger is to meat."
I think for CDP's sake, Hilbilly might want to take off the next few plays...
CDP ~ I can't believe it's clown porn free since 2004

I just mixed two together there.
Man...again with the Hillbilly! The correct term is "redneck", and it has been years since I have lived in a house with big trucks that didn't start strewn about the front yard.
Is clown porn really a thing? I need to do some research!
Yup...I now understand why some people are afraid of clowns.

"CDP is to funny what Boca Burger is to meat."

Adequate but never quite right? Shame. Shame be to you.
Damn you, CDP. Why'd you have to open the TKAM can o' worms? I was so going to go there.

I've been in Indiana too long, I'm starting to get slow.
Who are these TKAM worms? I'm confused :(
BILLY - I did have a crush on Tara Lipinski during her Olympic run back in 1998 or whenever, but we were pretty much the same age. The fact that I get to watch this year's Olympics in HD has me giddy.

WILLIE - "Pitching a tent with the ghosts of dead grandparents." Man, that's awful.

Only you can prevent Clown Porn.
It took me a minute to figure out you were referring to me. I have to change my name.

And I will surely do what I can to prevent clown porn.
CARGIRL - Indiana will drain your will to live. It always feels like it takes a week to drive through that damn state.

I'm not entirely sure what TKAM is, but if it has anything to do with me being a pedophile, I'd probably rather not know.
I am also curious about the TKAM reference. That always makes me think of To Kill a Mockingbird because that is the abbreviation I always use when writing the title on the board. I am guessing I am not really in the ball park.
But on my own TKAM track:

"Shoot all the blue jays you want, but remember it's a sin to kill a CDP."
Come to think of it, I think that Cargirl is the sole reason why all this pedohpile stuff started in the first place.
Spelled that wrong. Sorry.
I thought of To Kill a Mockingbird too...that's the only thing I could think of with that abbreviation. Weird.
I meant to say To Catch A Predetor (TCAP), but I was in a To Kill A Mockingbird mood. I swear that it said TCAP when I wrote it. Damn Dsylexia.
Yeah, sorry 'bout that. I'm pretty sure I made the Chris Hansen joke when you and Cargirl were gettin' tight, yo.
CARGIRL - I figured you were talking about TCAP, but I kept looking at my keyboard and thinking, "There's no way she hit those keys by accident; they're like a mile apart."

I don't know what's funnier; Cargirl joking about pedophilia or my own mother calling me one.

MOE - A plague upon your house!
I don't know what's funnier; Cargirl joking about pedophilia or my own mother calling me one.

I don't know if it's funny, or just indicative of a serious problem.
"The CDP - Wisconsin's fourth best export".

(Someone more familiar with Wisconsin's economic strengths help me list the top three exports - starting with cheese?)


"The CDP - less stinky than Wisconsin's most famous export".

I'm just realllly trying to get this conversation centered around cheese.
I think they are both pretty funny.

It reminds me of a joke.

There was a girl sitting on the living room couch waiting for her boyfriend to come home. She had packed all her bags and was ready to leave him for good this time. When he walked in the front door, he asked for an explanation about all the luggage.

"I know the truth about you," she spat at him colding, her arms crossed in front of her.

"What?!" he replied. "I am sure that whatever you heard is just some story that someone made up to get you to leave me."

"No, I know what you are."

"C'mon baby! I am sure we can work this out. What did you hear?"

"I heard you are a pedophile"

"Wow...that's a pretty big word for a five year old."

I learned that from a student, and it makes me laugh. If finding that joke funny is wrong, that's okay because I know I am going to hell anyway.
"Pleasing to the palate like aged cheddar."

The exports: I think it goes 1. cheese 2. Ed Gein 3. Jeffrey Dahmer (though technically the last two never really left, but they live on through movies and Law and Order)
Okay, I missed post 100, but here we go anyway:

"The CDP-Refusing to admit that Arcade Fire sucks since 2004."
It reminds me of a joke.

There was a girl sitting on the living room couch waiting for her boyfriend to come home. She had packed all her bags and was ready to leave him for good this time. When he walked in the front door, he asked for an explanation about all the luggage.

"I know the truth about you," she spat at him colding, her arms crossed in front of her.

"What?!" he replied. "I am sure that whatever you heard is just some story that someone made up to get you to leave me."

"No, I know what you are."

"C'mon baby! I am sure we can work this out. What did you hear?"

"I heard you are a pedophile"

"Wow...that's a pretty big word for a five year old."

I learned that from a student, and it makes me laugh. If finding that joke funny is wrong, that's okay because I know I am going to hell anyway.

Ryan tells that joke all the time...weird.
HATHERY - Wow, I have refused to admit that the Arcade Fire sucks since 2004! Contest over! Cosmic.

Wisconsin's chief exports are as follows:

1. Cheese.

2. Favre (we're exporting him right out the door, actually).

3. Fireworks.

4. Jeffrey Dahmer/Ed Gein.

5. The CDP.
I did realize there was a huge fireworks export business in Wisconsin. I learned something today!
I can't wait to export Favre's floppy butt right out 'o Wisconsin.
I mean I did NOT realize...that one word makes a difference to the overall meaning.

I should go do something useful. Guitar Hero, here I come!
CDP - More fun than Guitar Hero
CDP - Tighter than Favre's butt
CDP - More Exciting Than Wisconsin
Man, Wisconsin's actual top exports are not amusing or witty at all:

1) Industrial Machinery
2) Electrical Machinery
3) Scientific/Medical Instruments

The only good one on the top ten list is "Cereals," which comes in at #7.

"The CDP - Bigger than Jesus and cereal combined."
I posted a link to the Rock Band 2 set list somewhere up in the comments today, and it's absolutely amazing.

I think I'm going to play 'Everlong' about a hundred times in a row the night I get it.
EMILY - 'Cereals' made me laugh really hard for some reason. Who knew?

KATE - "Better than this entire stupid state."
Ooo, also:

"The CDP - Wisconsin's #1 funniest export, if you don't count serial killers."
CDP - Tighter than Favre's butt

The CDP and a six year old are walking through the woods when the kid says:

"It's cold and I'm afraid of the dark"

CDP say's:

"You're afraid? I'm the one's who's going to walk back alone"
Beh heh heh! Pedophile jokes...
I used to tell the Missus that one, too. She was 16, I was 18, and I found it hilarious. Good thing she turned out to be my wife, and not some crazy girl that wanted me in jail.

I'd ask where these comments started getting way off-base, but something tells me it was probably my fault.
"The CDP - Probably at fault since 2004."

OK, I'm done for the day, I swear.
The CDP - Not a Pedophile since 2005!
TheCDP - Putting the Peanut Butter with the Jelly since 2004..

TheCDP - Welcome to the World's
Largest Dysfunctional Family

(Playing off of Olive Garden's motto)
At the CDP you're like family. Now get me another beer before I give you something to cry about...

Expect a list of roughly 200+ of these to end up in your inbox come due day.
I've got to be in the top 5. I'm like the BIGGEST batman fan. (I even have a post proving that Caveman=Super Batman fan, prepared for Friday)
CDP: Smells Like Pop Culture.

Too much wine. Ugh.
Here's my first effort at a tagline:

"The CDP: so presumptuous, it has it's own tagline."

Also, how are you keep track of all these?
CAVEMAN - Looking forward to reading them; the more, the merrier.

"Successfully cleared of all charges!"

KATE - I like that the CDP is your 'drunk blog.'
EPHLAND - I was rocking taglines back when I had 4 readers a day.

I'm keeping track of them by rifling through the comments and e-mails and jotting down my personal favorites. The list will get narrowed down to the 5 winners next Wednesday. There not too scattered all over the place; shouldn't be too difficult.
@CDP: Whoa whoa whoa If I was drunk, interneting would not be possible...

...but Karaoke may be.

CDP: Literary Drunken Karaoke
Anytime you're near Madison, my offer to share the stage with you still stands.

124 comments today...maybe we can break 200 tomorrow.
The CDP: Putting the sin in Wisconsin since 2004.

... I'm going to go think of more ... that's all I've got.
"The CDP: 73% better than you, 100% aware of it."

"The CDP: If you can find a better blog, you're a dick."
(that was mostly just for me)
"If you can find a sturdier Hypno-coin, buy it."
"CDP-Now even bigger and tastier."

WILL- I love that "Not a pedophile since 2005." Giggity.
"CDP-You like candy?"
If it's going to be another day of 'CDP is a Pedo' comments, I should just take the day off and go back to bed.
That is the last of it for me. Besides, all ages like candy. I love candy. :)
"The CDP: If you can find a better blog, you're a dick."

Es muy bueno!
"CDP-Better than a bathtub full of butterscotch pudding."
Roger Ebert gave The Dark Knight four stars. Pretty amazing, considering that the movie is 100% nudity-free.
"CDP-The Dark Knight of the Internet."
CDP: Better Than Batman
At the very least, better than Buttman.
"Pretending to be a Red Sox fan since 2004"
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At the very least, better than Buttman.

I dunno, Will may disagree with you there.
This comment has been removed by the author.
"Pretending to be a Red Sox fan since 2004"

I'm pretty sure the CDP is a full-blown Brewers fan now. We've got a pretty kickin' team. My boyfriend Prince Fielder included!
I could never abandon my Nationals, but I have to say the Brew Crew now hold a special place in my heart since they traded for CC Sabathia.

That gives them 2 legit fat guys playing a prominent role on their team... the other of course being the guy Hathery is going to leave the CDP for, Prince Fielder.
My relationship with the Sox and Brewers is somewhat complicated and turbulent. The Brewers play games with my heart; they build me up, toy with me and eventually let me down, but I always come crawling back. I can't quit them.

The Red Sox, on the other hand, are dependable. You always know what you're going to get, and chances are it's going to be awesome now matter what. No matter what comes and goes with Milwaukee, me and the Red Sox will always be tight. When me and the Brewers have a fight, it's the Red Sox that I turn to for comfort.
You know, Duke's been "dependable" for over 20 years, now.

I'm sure they'd love to have you.

Where's JT?
now = no.

The Brewers are looking good this season; they don't have the big lead that they did at this point last year, but I believe that momentum is on their side. I've managed to see damn near all of their games so far this year.

Last week, Sabbathia pitched a complete game and hit a home run. I damn near shed a tear.
MOE - Last I heard, JT's having some computer problems and is incommunicado.

And yeah, I didn't mean 'dependable' as in 'constantly winning championships,' because we all know that ain't the truth. In fact, the only thing dependable about the Sox was complete heartbreak until 2004.

Ortiz has the best beard in the game, though.

Giambi's moustache is also pretty amazing, though.
never underestimate what a good mustache and a steady stream of HGH pumping through your veins can do to rejuvenate a baseball career.
Mmm-hmm; that sounds a lot like how I got through college.
Prince Fielder has nothing pumping through his corpulent veins but veggie burgers and sunflower seeds.
Proof that vegetarians are anything but frail.
Vegans are frail. haha.
I'm frail, but is has nothing to do with being vegetarian. It has to do with being a wuss. :)
I'm like Helga on Gladiators...strong like bull.
"The CDP: The best thing on the internet besides porn, games, and cyberstalking."
I never thought that there would come a time where the hottest cast on television would be American Gladiators, but I've been pleasantly proven wrong. Between Crush, Hellga, Jet and Phoenix, it's like there's an Eliminator going on in my pants.

Sorry. I'm so sorry.

EPHLAND - It's true; I can't hold a candle to porn, games are free and plentiful, and cyberstalking truly is my hobby of choice.

"A vice you can be proud of. Sort of."
I just had lunch with Kenny Frankly, and it was awesome.
Okay, here are my submissions for today...

"The CDP: Where fun goes to die since 2004"

"Welcome to the CDP. Please have a seat over there"

"The CDP: You're soaking in it!"

"Wisconsin's blankiest blank!"

I'm not sure why I'm still trying, since I'm pretty sure there are at least three people who have me beat by leaps and bounds...
But this beats actually doing work.
"CDP: Making work better since 2004, just like alcohol."
MAUS - Not true; there are some good ones out there, but nothing that has made me say "That's a winnah!"

Everyone should keep 'em coming until Tuesday night.
Might as well send Will and Cargirl their posters. It's down to three boys and girls...

Nice job, Will/Cargirl.
CARGIRL - That's a winnah!
I'd have won a poster had it not been for that crazy kid and her dog.
I remember Will saying yesterday that he doesn't want a poster, so that might have made him exempt from the contest if he meant it.

I don't really want to send these things out to someone who doesn't want them (nor they having to receive them), so I'm going to be sure to find that out when I make my picks. I'll select the Top 10, so there are alternates just in case.
Wait. This blog is the cause and solution of all of life's problems?
Thank you, thank you. I'd like a Writer's Guild application before I answer any questions.
I'd say the cause, more than the solution.


The CDP ~ Avoiding Old Spice since 2004.
MAUS - Pretty much. For me, at least.

CARGIRL - I just realized that when I pick my favorites, probably nobody will agree with me, which will start a huge argument on here, which will lead to people harboring animosity, which will lead to awkwardness, which will lead to everyone leaving the CDP, which will lead to be hanging myself on the overpass.
be = me.
Exactly, but remember to hang yourself in an overpass after you send out the posters. Don't make your wife do all that work!
Hey, I'll be sad if my searing wit doesn't earn me a poster, but there isn't much in the world that could make me feel animosity toward my fellow CDPeons.


"The CDP - Like cyber bunnies for your internet pants."
I can't stop laughing! I keep hitting 'REFRESH' to see what witty line is posted next...between these comments and the Sid & Marty Krofft myspace page with vid clips, work remains untouched.
CARGIRL - I figured she'd be working hard enough on funeral arrangements. I wonder how much Poster Tubes are gonna run me...

EMILY - Gawww. Such a nice, little family we have here. The fact that all of these comments have been made by approximately 12 people, I think that's the absolute definition of 'cult following.'

RISSA - Work can wait; the CDP will get you through it. Let it wash over you like a fine, silk garment of some sort.

29 hours until I see The Dark Knight!
CDP: Safer Than a Real Cult
The CDP ~ Continuing the search for Hale Bop since 2004.
CDP: Don't Drink the Tang
Work will definitely wait as I'm too busy reading the comments, watching Land of the Lost and playing the 'Weekend Box Office Numbers' game with our Marketing and Distribution departments...

So much to do. So little time.
"Tang for the soul."

I like things that sound funny, but really aren't.
Or, things that sound dirty, but really aren't.
Like a laptop?
"Tang for the soul."

Or TING for the soul? Give that some thought.
"Tang" always makes for great innuendo.

"The CDP - Growing boys and girls need tang!"
"The CDP: Have some tang with him. No, it's okay, I'm a friend of your parents."
I'm = He's
CARGIRL - You can get a nasty virus from a dirty laptop. Remember; use Norton all the time, every time.

HATHERY - Ting is Soul Soda. I need to write an essay on that stuff before I drink it all up.

EMILY - Totally; I love the 'tang' jokes. It's probably the dirtiest term I use on a regular basis in regards know.

We drove to Winnebago County a few weeks ago so I could score a few cases of this obscure Wisconsin soda from the 60's named 'Ting' (full story later). Anyway, I remember saying to the Missus (by complete accident), "I can't wait to go north this weekend and score some of that tang."

She gave me a concerned look, as you would imagine.

I noticed my mistake, we shared a hearty laugh and went to bed.
Tang rules in every sense of the powdered beverage word. I put in about 8 scoops worth, until it's all sludgy and dark. Dee-lish.
Oh yeah. In grade school, everyone used to eat straight Tang, Kool Aid and Fla-Vor-Ice and Pixie Stix because we thought we were cool. We just all got heart problems.
That sounds...really gross. Disgusting, actually.

Man, I hate making endless copies of things. Whatever happened to the "paperless ofice"?? Damn bureaucracy is killing the rainforests and causing global warming.

At least you can say the CDP is more Earth-friendly than the average government agency...
Not Fla-Vor-Ice, but Fla-Vor-Aid.
"The CDP: Developing adversarial relationships with hedgehogs since 2007" (?)
Every time I hear the word "tang", I think of a terrible song on Bob and Tom. I laugh at the song, but then I cry at the level my sense of humor has fallen to.
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Is really was gross, Maus, but it was our form of energy drinks back in the 90's/early 00's.
CARGIRL-I remember that some of my friends were snorting pixie stix at my graduation party, and this greatly upset on of the other friends. He started shouting, "At least snort something useful, like cocaine!" Ahhh, fun times.
We were hardcore kids. We would snort that and then pretend to be really high, but no one knew anyone else was pretending.

People snort weird things. This guy in my Chemistry class snorted like chalk and pencil lead once, but he's a stoner.
No poster for me thanks, you can all pay me in clicks over to my blog. The blog where you'll never wake up feeling extra groggy with your pants missing.
WILL - You got it, yo.

MAUS - The CDP is totally Earth-friendly! We run completely on Spotted Owls and Brazilian Oak.

CARGIRL - I was also one of those kids that inhaled metric tons of powdered candies. Lik-M-Aid was great because the stick was made of pure sugar. If I tried to eat that today, I'd probably have a heartattack, mainly because of all the cocaine I'm currently gacked out on.
Just a cool note: The all-time CDP Comments record is 205, set on November 30, 2007. This was due in part to the release of 65 Poor Life Decisions.

Looks like we will break that record today, marking only the second time we have ever broken the 200 comment mark. Not too shabby.

Furthermore, tradition states that the 100th Comment is usually 'Arcade Fire sucks,' via the Missus.

What should the 200th Comment tradition be?

'I can see your butthole' instantly springs to mind.
I can see your butthole.
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