Thursday, July 23

Rimshot Thursday III.

(NOTE: While authorities continue to search for missing author Ryan J. Zeinert, the CDP will be publishing previously unreleased and 'lost' content from his vast archives in his absence. The following contest was found on a flash drive Mr. Zeinert had left behind; it also contained a love letter from your mother.)

Today is Rimshot Thursday, which means that I'd like you to come up with as many punchlines as possible for the following line and post them in the comments section:

"Wow, if cigarettes were any more hazardous to your health…"

Here are a few to get you started:

"...Mickey Rourke would probably be eating them."

"...McDonalds would be blending them into their milkshakes."
"....We may have to finally stop letting people smoke them around kids."
(Hey, they can't all be funny, right?)

Have fun, be creative and enjoy your day.

...Westinghouse would be dumping them into streams.
...they'd be a subsidiary of Blue Cross/Blue Shield.
...I wouldn't need the arsenic ex-wife wouldn't have made me quit smoking.
Holy shit they're dangerous? Why doesn't somebody tell me these things?

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