Friday, January 2

Two Minutes Of 2014.



Here's a thing I wanted to share with you as a kind of final haymaker punch to the frustrating year that was 2014.

There's this app called 1 Second Everyday. You put it on your phone and start shooting video. As much or as little as you want, for as long as you want. After a certain amount of time, 1SE will string all of your clips together into tiny increments, giving you a frantic video patchwork of your last month, year or whatever. It's a cool idea, works like a charm and never crashed on me. I think it costs a dollar.

Near the end of 2013 and deep into 2014, I tried to remind myself to shoot some video everyday for my 1SE project. I'm not the type to capture a lot of photos and video when experiencing something interesting, and sometimes I would just grab a few seconds of me petting the cats, but I did manage to put together about 120 seconds of usable footage. It's mostly sushi, cats and beer, but I cannot think of a more accurate snapshot of how I live my life.

No, seriously. A lot of sushi, cats and beer.

So anyway, here it is (after a few tweaks and adding some music). Take it or leave it; I just couldn't bear to have it sitting on a hard drive. Turn up the sound, watch and enjoy.

So long, 2014. For real. The CDP returns with more new stuff shortly.

Wednesday, December 31

2014 CDP Year In Review.

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What did you do this year? I grew a beard once!

Anyway, here it is; the entirety of 2014, through the eyes of the Communist Dance Party. Click liberally and have fun tonight. I will be at home with a glass of wine, playing Cards Against Humanity with my cats. You're not invited, only because I don't have enough chairs and don't want to put the leaf in the table.

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In February, I returned for Season 10 of the CDP by telling a story about who I was, where I've been and where I was going, all brought on by the unholy consumption of a giant shrimp's head at local sushi bar. I also took the time to once again mention that I've been doing this shit for over a decade now, which could mean that I'm suffering from any number of neurological maladies, narcissism being the least of my concerns at this point.

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The Winter of 2014 was long and exceptionally bitter, which meant that I needed to fix my fireplace if I were to remain comfy and tastefully romantic with the Missus during the long February evenings. Of course, I know nothing about natural gas or fireplace repair, so the whole thing was more or less like defusing a bomb (Spoiler: I didn't asploded).

If you can believe it, I was still recapping The Walking Dead up through Season 4. Seriously; I had to go back and double check, because I had absolutely no recollection of this whatsoever. Turns out, it was still pretty funny, although I'm pretty sure nobody liked these particular captions but me.

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In late March through mid-May, the CDP embarked on one of the biggest Pop Culture meltdowns in history, as 128 television shows fought for your vote to determine the Greatest TV Show Of The Last 25 Years.

As the weeks rolled on, the votes piled up, the upsets were fierce and the debates swept through the comments, Facebook and Twitter like wildfire. I spent most nights tabulating votes right until midnight, when a new round would start and a new slew of votes came rolling in. I had never turned the page over to you peeps like that before, and despite all the bitching, it was a ton of fun.

In the end, I was able to see through an idea I had been kicking around for two years, and despite my perceived grumpiness through it all, it was freaking awesome and I plan on doing a similar tournament sometime in 2015. You've been warned.

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After six straight weeks of non-stop updates, I took a month off to pet cats and gain weight, two talents I desperately need to monetize for the good of my future. However, I returned with something I felt was important: A plea to help out my nephew. And after several months of getting the word out and thanking a lot of extremely generous people, I'm happy to say that he raised enough cash to receive his service dog. How cool is that?

August was Rerun Month, as I reheated my Top 100 Simpsons Episodes list in honor of FXX's 2-week-long, 'Every Simpsons Ever' marathon. In the end, I think I DVR'd over 100 episodes.

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September was busy, as I kicked things off with my Fall TV Preview, always one of my favorite posts of the year. If that wasn't enough, I had an existential breakdown in the parking lot of a Sonic, and I was also busted having an illicit affair with a younger woman. I never said I was a role model.

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Finally, I went full Old Man Mode in my scathing rant on a local news station's uncanny ability to make mistakes during every single nightly broadcast. And to round it all out, you just saw my Best Of 2014 list no less than 24 hours ago. 


I can't say I had the time to blog as much as I wanted to in 2014, and I certainly didn't put forth as much stuff as I have in years passed, but I'm aware of it and hope to be a bit more prolific in 2015. Less Social Media, more CDP. That's my motto for...oh, at least the first 10 days of the new year, if I had to guess. That's about as far as I conciliate my resolutions until they melt away in a sea of comic books and Spotted Cow.

Thanks much, and Happy New Year. Sound off in the comments section and let me know what you'll remember most about 2014. The CDP will be back for Season 11 before you know it.

Tuesday, December 30

The CDP's Best Of 2014.

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Aaugh! I overslept! Quick, before 2014 ends, I have to tell you about all the stuff I liked! Read it before it expires! No time to explain! Go, go, go!

TELEVISION

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Honorable Mention - Black Mirror (Audience/Netflix)

It didn't premiere in 2014, but it did become legally available in America this year, otherwise it would have been #1 with a bullet. Go watch it immediately.

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Honorable Mention - Too Many Cooks (Adult Swim)

It's a shame Too Many Cooks can't be nominated for an Emmy. Or can it? In my opinion, it exists as a love letter to Television; that's all you really need to know.

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15. The Simpsons (FOX)
14. Constantine (NBC)
13. Community (NBC/Yahoo!)
12. Adventure Time/Regular Show (CN)
11. Gotham (FOX)

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10. American Horror Story: Freak Show (FX)
9. Attack on Titan/Space Dandy (Adult Swim/Toonami)
8. The Flash (CW)
7. The Goldbergs (ABC)
6. Louie (FX)

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5. Agents of SHIELD (ABC)
4. Brooklyn Nine-Nine (FOX)
3. Bob's Burgers (FOX)
2. Fargo (FX)

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1. The Walking Dead (AMC)

Much like a zombie apocalypse, you cannot stop The Walking Dead; you can merely hope to contain it. The ratings are insane, the cast is on fire, and the show itself is as good as it's ever been.

FILM

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Guardians of the Galaxy

Hand down, the most fun I've had at the movies all year, and an instant classic from the Marvel Universe. Saw it twice. The Missus saw it 4 times. Bought the soundtrack. Bought the action figures. Bought the comics. Bought in, entirely. Well done, all around.

MUSIC

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Honorable Mention - Guardians Of The Galaxy: Awesome Mix, Vol. 1
Honorable Mention - Radio Ready Wisconsin: Lost Power Pop Hits 1979-1982

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5. Scott Reynolds - Stupid World
4. Ozma - Boomtown
3. Masked Intruder - M.I.
2. Run The Jewels - Run The Jewels 2
1. Weezer - Everything Will Be Alright In The End

I don't lie when it comes to my music lists. If I didn't listen to it, I won't rank it. Unfortunately, I didn't listen to a whole lot of new records this year, so while I remained honest with myself (I truly liked all of these albums), I fully understand if you don't want to value my opinion anymore when it comes to modern music. In fact, I strongly encourage this behavior. I don't value my opinion, either.

BOOKS

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I read no new books in 2014, but probably read about 10-12 total pieces of book-like literature throughout the year. This is going to sound weird, but 2014 was the year I became re-obsessed with the JonBenet Ramsey murder, so I actually read 4 books specifically about that topic:

Foreign Faction - James Kolar
JonBenet - Steve Thomas
Perfect Murder, Perfect Town - Lawrence Schiller
The Cases That Haunt Us - John Douglas

...Yeah, I think I went in a little too deep this Summer. I was having nightmares and stuff. The Missus was concerned. Worse still, I'm not yet 100% sure I know what happened. Shit is maddening. Let me know if you want to theorize about it, because I have about a billion pages of theories for you. Screw Serial; this case is still plenty important.

GAMING

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Mario Kart 8 (Wii U)

I suck at Mario Kart 8. Suck out loud. I can't seem to get any better, either. I still love it to pieces, regardless. The Wii U looks beautiful with its (finally!) HD output. The music, track and cart innovations only add to the playability. Whether I'm good at it or not, Mario Kart 8 remains one of the heaviest hitters in Nintendo's arsenal.

Hey, we made it with time to spare! Sound off in the comments section, Facebook or Twitter, and let me know what your favorites of 2014 are.