Thursday, July 7

Toronto Diary - Day Five Point Five.

Here's the thing. Ben and Sherry are getting married in August. Again.

They're getting re-married on their 1st anniversary, because it's some sort of weird Jenkel tradition that nobody seems to understand, but I know you get extra gifts.

They're looking for a good picture of themselves to put on their invitations, so we took a bunch of them at Niagara Falls. They chose their five favorites, and now they want the CDP to make the final decision. Just leave a comment saying which one (or ones) you enjoy, and they'll go with the top vote-getter. Simple as that.

Here are some things to consider. We're going to Photoshop that logo off of Ben's shirt, so don't worry about it. We're also going to do something about Sherry's midriff. Pay more attention to the framing, background, shadows, weather or not they look like idiots, etc. They seemed to really like the grayscale shots we took of them, even though we could make any of them grayscale, but whatever. Just pick the one that you like the most. And away we go.

Picture #1 - "The Sit."

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Personally, I don't like this one. The four other pictures have Ben on the viewer's left, and that just looks more correct for some reason. Besides, look at his hands and facial expression. "Hi! I'm Benjamin, and I want to be a Fireman when I grow up!" Sherry's leaning against him as if she's a volunteer worker at the local hospital, and she took "Little Ben" to the Falls for a day trip. This isn't a husband and wife, this is a caretaker and a very ill man-child.

Picture #2 - "The Look."

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This was just featured in the last post, also known as the "Natalee Holloway picture", even though that is a very cruel and unnecessary joke. Nonetheless, I find it hard to turn away from a good caption when it pops into my head. Anyways, this is a decent and peaceful picture, certainly good for a Blog entry or slideshow. It's not so good when it comes to invitations. Turning your back on the camera is like turning your back on your family and friends. While that's always fun to do from time to time, keep in mind you're trying to come off as inviting, here.

Picture #3 - "The Third Wheel."

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This is a pretty decent picture. The idea here is to bring the Falls into the picture, almost introducing it to the viewer. Ben and Sherry are out of frame to give the Falls some room, let it get comfortable and help itself to whatever's in the fridge. Personally, I don't think that Niagara Falls would make a very good friend. I mean, it's up at all hours of the night, constantly makes noise and having all of his damn friends over who can't speak English. All I know is that I wouldn't want to share a place with him. The wind managed to blow some sort of a part into Ben's hair, and they're both looking at the camera without blinking.

Picture #4 - "The Domineering Husband."

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This picture is just slightly wrong. First off, in trying to capture both of the falls in one shot, you're left missing out on just about everything. The camera is just a little too far away from both of them, and Sherry is leaning way over onto Ben, almost shaping herself like the letter "S". Also, the wind is blowing Ben's hair into Sherry's hair, making it almost appear as if they are joined by hair. Being joined by the hair would suck, because you could never cut it.

Picture #5 - "The Pants."

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This photo has the best shots of Ben and Sherry's faces, but everything else about it is no good. Again, the Falls is really obscured and pushed to the back of the photo, instead of welcoming it into the frame. The camera is pulled back way too far, exposing too many pants. Look at the tents and bunches that make up Ben's pants, and then tell me that we should put it on a wedding invitation. No thank you.

If it's all the same to everyone else, I'd like to propose my own personal pick for wedding invitation.

Picture #6 - "The Drink."

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I think this photo really says it all. They drink, they wrestle and fight, then they sleep and go to work. Why shouldn't they get married all over again?

So, there you have it. Ben and Sherry thank you in advance for staring at several photos of them, as well as choosing your favorite. I'll return with Day Six of the Toronto Diary in no time.

You should do something about the logo on the shirt, and maybe the midriff.

That said, I like "The Pants" the best. You could crop the tents and bunches out, or just make a blocky digital blur of that area. Mainly I like that pic because I like the word "pants" quite a bit.
You do realize that Sherry will yell at you when she sees this, right? Hilarious!
Oh, and I'd say #3. 4 and 5 have too much shadow on Ben's face. And Ben looks too much like a little kid in #1. Although #6 is very second wedding appropriate, and should be blown up to greet people at the door. speaks for itself...
Oh man, the monkey in that picture looks ridiculous.
Wow...I need to sit down after viewing that. It's a good thing I am sitting down. Seriously, who types standing up?

RJ, Sherry actually told me that she wanted me to do this, so I obliged. I don't think she asked for my ctitique, but if I waited for people to ask me what I thought, I'd be quiet forever.
Are #4 and #5 actually just the same picture cropped differently?
I am torn between 1, 2, and 3. I think the one of you guys looking over the falls is cute in a sentimental, wedding invite kind of way.

Ryan, why must you make fun of the pictures? I took them! It's not like you could have done'd just take a picture of the railing or of their feet or something.
I'm not making fun of the pictures! I'm just saying that there's too much shadow! Just one more reason to hate the sun. And I realize she asked you to do this... I'm talking about the last picture.

Seriously, I didn't even know they made the sun at 7:30am. When am I up at this time?!
The Missus was mad at me, RJ, not you. Besides, I was just being funny. All of the pictures look good. You can tell what pictures are mine because they're all abstract and pointless. The Missus takes "Postcard" pictures.

4 & 5 look incredibly similar, now that you mention it. They're not the same, but close.
My first choice would be picture #6, "The Drink". I would add the quote..."We cannot really love anyone with whom we never laugh." It shows the fun side of them. If I had to choose another one I would choose picture #2 "The Look" and add the quote..."We are all a little wierd and life's a little wierd, and when we find someone whose wierdness is compatible with ours, we fall in mutual wierdness and call it love." A couple other quotes for picture #6 could be..."Marriage is our last best chance to grow up" or "Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight." I think the people who know them would understand the quotes. Although I like the first one the best. Thanks and gold luck.
Oops I mean "Good Luck."
A good caption for #6 could be, "Take your pants off, now!" For that was what a drunken Sherry was demanding that me and Aaron do that night. Wedding invitation material it is not, and that makes it funny.
I think since it is their second wedding,(to one another),they can take the chance at being less serious.
It's their second wedding to each other, and the last wedding for neither.

I'm just kidding. Actually, me and the Missus have been divorced for months now, but we stick together for the kids.
I think they should use the picture of Tony Little and the monkey.
There is another (better) form of picture #6 on your Jan. 2005 post.
Yeah, I took a few pictures of Ben manhandling Sherry that night.

Yeah, Tony Little and the monkey should be used. Holy crap is that a funny picture.
Yeah, RJ I was talking to Ryan Z. Sorry! Forgot your real name wasn't RJ :) Your criticism was constructive.
I wonder if Tony's manager got an angry phone call that day. You can see in his eyes and the forced smile he's trying to convince himself there's something positive about the situation. Poor Tony Litte. Who is there to motivate you at the end of the day?
All Tony has left is his Gazelle.
That's all any of us really have, if you think about it, is Tony's Gazelle.
That either made no sense, or more sense than I'll ever know.

After some careful judging, I also think that "The Pants", properly cropped, would be the way to go. Take from that what you will. I like "The Third Wheel", but it comes off as a bit dark for some reason.
That's all you really need.
The Gazelle, I mean.
I've learned a lot about myself today.
ok the pants pic is good but i'm going to vote for the unpopular 4 where she's in an S shape... they look so comfortable together in that picture, none capture that untill you get down to the horny monkey humping pic - now THATs love
Welcome back, Fidget! Thanks for the vote.

Nothing says love like a drunken wrestling match. All the staged Niagara Falls pictures in the world can't match the emotion you feel when you airplane spin a loved one.
Did you know there is a new thing called "covenant marriage". Couples sign marriage licenses that legally obligate them to get counseling before they get married and before filing for divorce. The only permissible grounds for divorce are adultery, felony conviction, abandonment, abuse or a two-year separation. Right now only Louisiana, Arizona and Arkansas have it, but nine more states are considering them.
I'm sure that Nevada will be the next to file.
At our church they won't marry you until you have counseling. Somehow Sherry and Ben got out of it, though...logistics, I think.
The Jenkels paid 'em off.

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