Sunday, January 1

Welcome To The CDP!

Welcome To The CDP!

Greetings, first time visitor (or forgetful regular in need of a reminder). Welcome to the CDP. It's nice to see you looking so well. Sit down and let me get you a glass of your favorite carbonated or powdered beverage (Tab? Tang?). I have something to share with you about this very page.

The CDP is a humorous personal essay/pop culture/current event/indie hipster snob site started by yours truly in February of 2004. Instead of looking for a job after graduating from college, I starting pouring a lot of free time into this page. Now that I'm married and have a decent job, I spend even more time devoted to it. It's especially nice to work on it while I'm at the office, because in essence I get paid to do so.

In case anyone from the office is reading this, understand that I'm kidding, and you're no better anyways.

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This is me. I'm that guy. I run the CDP.

I was born in February of 1982, and I grew up in a very small town in Wisconsin. I had no neighbors and an endless yard that bordered on endless cornfields and endless wooded areas. Our family owned a historic farm that I helped out at from time to time. We had pigs. Every now and then, I would get to wrestle and hold them. It was a pretty sweet deal, until a figurative meteor crashed into our barn and we were forced out of our home. Somewhere in amongst the bouncing from house to house, I gained a sister and my folks split up. I called it a wash, and moved on with my new life.

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I was a full time public scholar from 1986 to 2000. Somewhere during that span of time, I got a nasty concussion, spent two weeks in England and met a few people I still hang out with today. I was a straight 'C' student, mainly because there was no reason or motivation to do any better. I had more important things to do, like play the drums and plod through a series of awful period haircuts.

I'd tell you more about what went on with me during the 90's, but that would mean sacrificing most of my blog material in the introduction, and that would be just plain stupid. Throughout my page, I do a pretty good job of filling in the gaps, though. The best showmen keep their audience wanting more, and it would be a shame if you left so soon. Tang refill?

By the time I graduated high school in 2000, I was engaged to the Missus.

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That's her in the backseat. She's the Missus, and she's awesome. She's a little younger than me, so after I graduated high school, I waited a couple years for her so we could move together and go to college. I worked at a hardware store in my hometown until 2002, and we eventually moved to Madison together.

The Missus got a job here right away, so we could live on macaroni & cheese 7 days a week without having to work as a low-grade escort. Things were rough at first because we were young and flat-ass broke, but it all smoothed out once I realized that the Missus could kill me if she really wanted to. I grabbed myself a degree in recording, sound and music technology that sits unframed in a filing cabinet, and got myself a job of my own to pay off the loans.

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We picked up a couple cats and a hedgehog along the way, and lost 5 fish and 2 mice. We also got married in June of 2004.

As of today, the Missus works in an expensive building in downtown Madison, and I am an Exam Administrator with the State of Wisconsin. I make sure that crooked professionals (like doctors, nurses and real estate agents) don't get their license and hurt you. If you live in Wisconsin, you should thank me for making your life a little safer. It's clearly not what I want to be doing with my life, but show me someone who's living their dreams, and I'll show you someone who's a jerk. Or Tony Little, if you're really lucky.

Enough about me, let's talk about me and my page.

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The CDP started out as 'The Communist Dance Party', but was shortened for legal reasons. The link remains the same, but the mesquite flavor has been improved by at least 10%. Also, I don't have to explain the joke to my concerned relatives anymore.

I normally talk about myself through current and nostalgic essays. Pop culture plays a major role (TV and music, mainly), although I'm currently making a living telling stories about my own life. Click on the link, and start looking around.

You can contact me at I'm an ordained Reverend and I can legally officiate weddings in the state of Wisconsin. I'm also not kidding.

Thanks for stopping by, and take a minute to look around. I'm sure you'll eventually find something that makes you happy. If you don't, you can go straight to hell. Get out of my house, and give me back my Tang.

-The CDP
December 2005

Great story CDP. Wish I had some student teachers like that back then. Most of mine looked like Mrs. Kravitz on "Bewitched". Did have one good lookin' nun but the habit covered everything but her eyes, mouth and nose. Here's wishin' you 'happy holidays' from the Coconut Internet.
What do you get when you cross lutefisk with a tab of acid?
A trip to Stoughton.
You're officially going to be the preacher at my wedding. You have no choice, I am stronger than you.
So, I stumbled upon this blog on accident the day before yesterday and I'm kinda in love now. I spent forever reading through the mix tape reviews.

"WHAT? When did they cover that?"

Basically, keep doing what you're doing.

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