Thursday, June 21

Pick Me Up, Carry Me Home.

Pick Me Up, Carry Me Home.

Here are 10 things to chew on. Get caught up, feast on table scraps and so forth.

1. My 3rd Anniversary was on Tuesday; me and the Missus celebrated by going out to a nice restaurant and crawling into bed by 11. It was all we cared to muster. Still though, I continue to love the woman more and more with each passing day.
It's probably the dementia catching up with me. Nah, she's pretty awesome sometimes.

2. My Great-Grandmother passed away last weekend at the age of 95. The funeral was a somber but celebratory atmosphere, perfectly encapsulated by the following quote from my Dad:

"Yeah, it's sad, but she was 95 years old! If there was something she needed to do, she probably already did it by now."

My projected year of death is currently 2050. I'll be 68 years old and more than ready to shuffle off. Also, 2050 is the projected release date of the CDP Book.

3. Speaking of which, the CDP Book is still running smoothly, albiet a bit slowly. The editing phase is a long one, and I'll let you know when I finally emerge. The CDP will stay in limbo until I say otherwise; I appreciate your support.

4. With a new Guitar Hero game arriving in July, I've been counting down the days by learning how to play Guitar Hero II with my opposite hand. I figure I can at least use this trick to impress the children at Best Buy. I already play left-handed with the notes backwards, so what I'm really trying to say is that I'm better than you. Always and forever.

5. The new banner at the top of the page is temporary and will be replaced by something cooler in the near future. I have more important things to be working on, so please bear with it for the time being.

6. Cute girls that work on commission at The Buckle should be banned from this planet from this point forward. Every time I'm approached by them, I cannot help but drop $200 and leave with bags of stuff that I'll never wear again. Years later, I'll see 8 shirts in the back of my closet with the tags still on them, and remember where I went so very wrong. These women need to be stopped; they know we're defenseless against their charms.

7. Me and the Missus were eating dinner on historic State Street last weekend, when I noticed a concert flyer on a kiosk across the street. I thought it was advertising a Sage Francis concert in Madison, which got me very excited. When dinner was done, I ran across the street to see the date of the show, when I noticed that it was actually a flyer for a Page France show.

My vision may not be superior anymore, but I'd like to think that anyone would have been fooled. It was the same font and everything.

8. I'm currently up to the letter 'J' in my CD collection in regards to the 'Upload everything I own into iTunes' project. My goal is to be done by the end of the year. Due to my CD purchasing habits, however, I will not be able to catch up with myself ever.

9. I just got done watching the 10th Anniversary edition of the AFI Top 100 Films special, and I've been left a bit inspired. I always push myself into watching and appreciating more classic American cinema, so I've made a promise to myself for the month of July. For the entire month, I will move heaven and earth to take in at least 1 classic movie every day. I'll keep you posted on my progress, which should fizzle out by Independence Day.

10. When do you want the next CDP Live Video Chat to be? Sound off in the comments section, and pick a date sometime in July. Allow me ample time to promote the hell out of the thing, and place fliers in select urban areas.

Back at it. Have a good one.

While the rest of their stuff hasn't interested me much, I love Page France's Hello Dear Wind album.
Yup, I'm not saying anything bad about them, I was just really looking forward to that non-existent Sage Francis show.

Now Paste, because you secretly are Sage Francis, would you consider hitting up Madison on your next spoken word tour?
I'll consider it. I've been thinking for a while about doing an unspoken word tour.
Very trendy.

I remember seeing a stand-up comedian say something like that. He was regarding that Gangsta Rap was becoming so confrontational and violent, that future rappers wouldn't even say anything. They would just get on stage and posture to the crowd.
Hell, I would even come to Madison for an unspoken word tour.

COngrats on the anniversary, by the way. The first anniversary of my divorce is next Tuesday, so that should be fun.

As for the next chat, I'm booked every weekend in July, so I suggest a Thursday night.
This Unspoken Word tour is going to be off the chain. "The Monsters Of Really Quiet Rock!"

Sometimes a celebration of a divorce is just as rewarding as a celebration of marriage. Take your lady friend somewhere nice.

I'm thinking a Wednesday or Thursday night for the chat. Mmm-hmm.
Well, since I'm always working at the bar on Tuesdays, I think I'll just mention it loudly to co-workers and regulars so I can get free drinks.

On another note, CDP, you and the Missus know stuff about cats. I don't. I'm cat-retarded. Melissa and I adopted a tiny kitten yesterday that a friend rescued from a storm drain. SO far, he's eating pretty well, but not drinking much at all. I'm taking him to the vet next week with my dogs. Any tips between now and then?
Don't let your dogs eat him.

But seriously folks, depending on how little this kitten is, you may want to consider bottle-feeding him some formula. It's caring AND adorable.

Also, lack of drinking may be caused by a UTI or kidney issue. Gently(!) press on the kitten's bladder and see if he's in discomfort.

Really though, we should just sit tight until the Missus speaks up.
Just make sure he has plenty of fresh water available to him. You could check and see if he likes running tap water. Some kitties will only drink moving water for some reason.
Hathery- Moving water tastes better.

CDP- I make the Sage Francis/Page France mistake all the time.

Paste- HDW is a pretty rexy album. My favorite, though, the first track. It reminds me of hurdling through Jackson, MS on no sleep a year or so ago on the way to NOLA. In my haze, I mistook the lyrics to say, " a wrecking ball with a heart of gold..." It seems too apropos for the situation not to sing it that way (the wrong way) from that point on.

1) Happy Anniversary! The tradition gift for your year is leather, but the modern gift is crystal/glass. I'm not sure what you're supposed to make of that.

2) Live Chat maybe on a Thursday in mid-July?

3) CDP taught me Guitar Hero and Wii this weekend. In trade, I provided homemade mint juleps. CDP then topped me with his Bomb Pops and then kicked my ass at Mario Kart. I have to say it was a good day.
CDP/Hathery - He's at her house, so my dogs will be unable to eat him, barring them suddenly learning how to drive and use a map.

We are bottle-feeding him, although this morning he was extremely convinced that the end of my nose was a nipple (it is not.)

He has a shallow bowl full of water in "his" room. I just stopped by her house to check on him. Stand by for pictures and a post on him tonight/tomorrow.


Kenny - Moving water does taste better. So does moving beer, which is why funnelling and shotgunning is so much fun.
KENNY- I'm glad you had a good time this weekend. So did we. I really think we need to hit the Pool Barn next time around, though.

Our next Guitar Hero lesson will be 'Rock Poses.' Wear something comfortable.

We don't wear leather and we have a basement full of crystal, so it was a pretty uneventful 3rd Anniversary. Damn, dirty hippies and their crystal.

JT- I could just imagine those dogs driving around in a convertible, arguing over directions to the Cat's house. I laughed pretty hard.

Nose nipple = Adorable. Looking forward to the photos.

CDP Live Chat #2- A Thursday night in mid-July. I'll begin scouting the dates.
For the entire month, I will move heaven and earth to take in at least 1 classic movie every day.

I think what you meant is you'll be watching one one classic movie every day for the rest of never.
Nope, I'm going to give it a try.

MST3K legend Kevin Murphy took in a different movie at a different theater every day for a year, as documented in his sub-par book, A Year At The Movies. If he can do that, what I'm attempting it small potatoes.

Small potatoes, I say!

My plan is to watch a daily classic film as soon as I get home from work every day, in the evening (if it's a film the Missus wants to watch with me), or after the Missus is slumbering, while I work on my book. If anything, it'll give me 2 hours a day to take in some classic cinema and also get some much-needed work done.

We'll see how it goes; I really want to document this on the CDP as well. There's just so many good movies out there that I've never seen.
Works for me, hon.

I must say...this blog reviewing business is hard!!!! Has everyone checked out my blog yet??? have you??? huh? If not, you should. It's in the CDP network as "Rate My Blog..." I just reviewed a kid's personal blog. How do you review a blog that you really couldn't care less about??? it's hard.
That young man has a brilliant vocabulary.
I know, it's crazy!!!!
CDP - What classic movies have you already seen? I'd love to recommend a few.

Also, kitten post/picture is up.
He's seen Happy Gilmore, Scream, She's All That, etc. You know...classic film. haha.
Don't know about the classic nature of these, but I recommend:

Dog Day Afternoon
Planet of the Apes (The original, of course. One of the best movies ever made. Period. Don't deny it!)

Mr Smith Goes to Washington


12 Angry Men

The African Queen

The Cannonball Run
Because everything I do requires a challenge of some sort, I'll only be watching movies I TiVo off of TCM and AMC over the course of July. This greatly hinders my selections (and gives me nights where I have to watch something I'm not too nuts about), but it also forces me to watch and potentially enjoy films I never would have seen.
Oh man, please go find Mr. Roberts Its one of the few movies I could watch on a loop.

Anything with Charlton Heston in it is an instant classic.
I think I would enjoy your insights on this classic movie-watching endeavor. I have always wanted to do the same thing, but I have yet to find the time.

Anyway, here is a list of 102 "Essential" movies to see before you die. It was compiled by Roger Ebert's editor, who's blog I read on a regular basis. It's not necessarily a list of the "best" movies of all time, but a list of the most influential/important movies necessary to have seen to be able to talk down to everyone around you.

Happy Midsummer's Day. Indulge yourself with some "silly" pagan ritual. It's what all the cool kids are doing.
CDP - The idea of regulating your movies by only watching TCM and AMC is pretty cool. I agree that it will limit your selection somewhat, but I love the idea that it will force you to watch films you would otherwise avoid.

It's kind of like when I force myself to only watch porn off of TEN or Playboy because the really hardcore stuff on Spice is desensitizing me to fetishes.
GODOT- I don't have the time, either, but I'm forcing myself to find it. It probably means I'll be losing some sleep, but I'm all for experimentation. I actually expect to crack about two weeks in and start straight breakin' stuff.

I will check out the list, and I made sure to drink plenty of Mead last night whilst dancing in my yard.

JT- Every time I come up with a plan, there always has to be a hitch that might lead to my demise. Deep down, I live to witness my self-destruction.

Come on, you act like taking in 6 straight hours of Clown Porn is going to wreck your brain somehow. No chance!
Clown porn is gateway porn, CDP. It leads to harder stuff, like midget clown porn, and sad clown porn. Not to mention clown snuff films. Those are hardcore.
Sad midget clown snuff porn.

I envision some interesting search terms in 3...2...1...
I was going to leave a comment full of other words that could lead to interesting search terms, but decided against it.

amputee transgender
Thanks; I appreciate your maturity.

(poop dump whiz)
I'm not sure if I've mentioned it here before or not, but it is one of my goals in life to amass a clown porn collection. Not because I have a strong desire to watch clowns do uncomfortable things to each other (THAT's just an added bonus), but because I want my friends and family to find it when I die. It puts a smile on my face thinking about them stumbling upon the cache while going through my belongings and automatically thinking I had some sort of secret, dirty fetish life they had no idea about.

Good times.

(chicken clucking mango fetish.)
I love you, Godot.

That's a good reminder to everyone out there. Every time you leave the house, treat it as if you might never come back. What are your loved ones going to find in there?

For me, the most embarrassing thing they would find is the rap CD I made when I was 14, rhyming over instrumental tracks from Naughty By Nature songs.

There. It's out in the open now.
You down with C D P?

Ya you know me!
Jeebus H. Christ, I think I may also be in love with Godot. That is the single most awesome thing ever.

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