Friday, February 20

Lost Friday - "316."

Season 5 - Episode 6: "316."

Well, now we're getting somewhere.

One of the things about Lost that we forget from time to time, is that there's about 25 more episodes left, and that's it. Sure, it may sound like a lot, but remember that they have an assload of loose ends to tie up before pulling the plug. Tonight was another giant leap forward, mainly in that they took another giant leap into the past. Season 5 has been all about waving the Nerd Flag, exposing the true intentions of the show and trying their hardest to keep everyone along for the ride, and they've done an unreal job.

Now let's make fun of them again.

(Jack comes to the sudden and horrific realization that he forgot to purchase a Digital Converter Box for his kitchen television.)


("Damn it, Hurley! There's Saltines back at the beach; let them go, man!")

("Huh-huh...we totally did it last night.")

("Hey Kate, remember last night? When we did it?")

("Kate, can you answer me a question; my mind is a little foggy. Did we totally do it last night?")

(If there was a complex, scientific nerve center underneath every Catholic church in America, the resulting Black Hole of Irony would disseminate every living being on the planet.)

("I'm trying to deliver a passionate monologue, here; stop worrying about if I'm going to run into that swinging pendulum or not.")


(Even after death, Locke still comes through with those Coldplay tickets he promised Jack.)

("I forgot to tell you that your father is an omnipotent, Godlike being that controls the Heavens and Earth. Musta slipped my mind. Keep the shoes.")

("If you must know, I tried to kill Penny and Desmond pounded the living crap out of me. Now are you going to send a cab or not? Okay. Thank you. Love you, too. Bye.")

(At least we know that Locke is going to have that delicious, Smokehouse flavor.)

("Hey John, wake up. Me and Kate totally did it last night!")

("Hello, sir. I am delivering a line of seemingly random dialogue so you will recognize me next week, when I'm unceremoniously blown to pieces on the Island. This is what they call 'Foreshadowing.'")

("Sun! So glad you made it! Did you hear what happened with me and Kate?")

("Look, dude. I bought all 78 of those seats, so I expect to be given all 78 of those meals.")

("I'm serious, Ben. And her neck totally tasted like strawberries. High-five.")

("Hey Lapidus, Autopilot this bitch for a second. I nailed Kate!")


(This photograph marks the first and last time that Vodka and Shoe Polish will ever share the same rocks glass.)

This concludes yet another historic Lost Friday. Sound off in the comments section and enjoy your weekend. The CDP returns on Monday, like it always does. In the meantime, check out links for previous Lost Fridays this season.

Season 5 - Episode 1/2 Review.
Season 5 - Episode 4 Review.
Season 5 - Episode 5 Review.

I'm trying to deliver a passionate monologue, here; stop worrying about if I'm going to run into that swinging pendulum or not.

This really pissed me off.

What would I do without Lost Friday? Thank you for what you do.
Thank you for not being one of them. (Mr. T Experience; iTunes this song immediately.)

For two minutes, TWO MINUTES, Desmond was having his moment in the sun, and all I could think about was, "Christ, he's going to smash into that thing and ruin everything."
Ooh, I kept waiting for the pendulum to clock someone in the head.

Someone said to me yesterday that their theory was that everyone on the Ajira airlines plane had taken the place of someone else on the original Oceanic flight - it wasn't just Locke who was functioning as a "proxy". It boggled my mind.

So what happened to Aaron? Did Kate throw him into the ocean or something?
MAUS - God, I hope so.

The Missus thinks that Kate is pregnant now with Jack's kid. Take from that what you will, but to me, it's beginning to look like the last episode will take place shortly before the Pilot Episode begins.

I sort of hope not; I've been wrong hundreds of times about this show.
Jin was driving a brand new 1970-ish Volkswagen bus. This, of course, was the same VW bus that Hurley used to truck-stick the Others.

Ben getting his ass kicked is the most intriguing thing, to me. Can't wait to see what happened.
I don't think that, I just overheard someone at work say that because they read it on some webpage.

that last picture of Jack is the best screen-cap ever.
Ha. "We totally did it last night."
No Stone Cold references on an episode called 316?
MOE - Yup. I think that the Island has been stuck in the Dharma 70's for quite some time at this point; long enough for Jin to hop on board. I wonder what will happen when he sees Sun.

My first thought about Ben was that he at least attemped to kill Penny, like he promised Charles after Alex was killed by Keamy.

HATHERY - Poor Jack. Such a sad man.

MIKE - I blew it on the Stone Cold references. That's the bottom line, because John Locke said so!
What I love most about your Lost Friday recaps is that I haven't actually watched an episode since mid season 3, and am just following along via your snarky photo captions. Somehow, I think when I finally do go through and watch them all, it just won't be as good.
Hands down, this week's winner is the Smokehouse Flavor caption.

But then again, I'm always a sucker for good, clean, cannibalistic humor.
My vote would be for the Coldplay tickets.

List Jack's three favorite bands, prior to hopping on flight 815.

EMILY - You get to experience Lost in a different way now; when you see something in an episode, it'll remind you of a Lost Friday joke, instead of the other way around. You get the best of both worlds, just in reverse order.

BRUCE - Thanks, man. I exclaimed that joke during the episode, and all of my friends in the room gasped a collective "Eeeew!", so I knew that it was going to be a winner.

MOE - I don't know why I kept thinking that concert tickets were in that envelope, but by the end of the episode, I was convinced of it.

Prior to Flight 815, I'd say that Jack's favorite bands were Top 40 types like Coldplay, U2 and Nickelback. Once he went back to full-blown alcoholic, he was constantly blaring Nirvana and the Pixies out of that Range Rover. See? Alcoholism does have a positive side.
I, too, thought Desmond was going to get hit in the head with the pendulum.

Also, what the hell did Kate do to Aaron? I've never really cared about him until now. I think maybe she gave him to Claire's mom so he wouldn't have to live on the island, but I really don't understand why she couldn't tell Jack.

Also, what did Sun do with her baby? Yeah, island life would suck for a young child, but your husband's there and do you really think you're going to be able to leave again? Look what's happened this first time you tried to leave ...
I was thinking the same thing about Sun's kid. It was SO DARN IMPORTANT for the pregnancy to be viable on the island, but now that the kid is born she just goes galavanting about to uncharted islands and leaves her behind.

I think that Kate hit Aaron in the head with a shovel and buried him. But that's just my gut feeling.
I was disturbed by the fact that Jack and Kate seemed so awfully randy following that whole cryptic "Don't ever ask about Aaron" conversation, almost as if the prospect of one of them commiting infanticide made them both really hot for each other. Creeeepy.
That 78 meals one has got to be my favourite of this series. Hurely fat jokes never get old.

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