Friday, February 12

Lost Friday - "What Kate Does."

Season 6 - Episode 3: "What Kate Does."

Another Lost Friday is upon us. We have much to discuss.

I want to thank Emily at The Lost Albatross for providing me with today's lead-off photograph, although she was inspired by a Bruce (BtotheD) tweet. I admire Emily and her blog because she's a tremendous talent that had the drive and faith in herself to abandon the daily grind and become a self-made Renaissance woman. I admire Bruce and his tweets because he's exactly the type of Twitter user that you should follow. Where my tweets are a delicate mix of the funny and the mundane ("eatin cookies lol!"), he's usually in a constant state of well-crafted goodness; much like his hair.

Enough ass kissing. Let's move on.

At approximately Noon today, my wife will be undergoing LASIK surgery. The Missus is looking forward to having her eyes corrected, as a lifetime of poor vision has left her with migraine headaches, expensive pairs of prescription glasses and a terrifying gargoyle of a husband whom she has never seen in the light of day. For her, this represents breaking free of the chains of a dulled sense; the brilliant wonder of being able to see the alarm clock without fumbling for her spectacles on the nightstand. For me, it represents being woefully broke for the next 18 months and carefully administering medicated drops to her corneal flaps without passing clean out.

You may recall that I spent the first half of January recovering from getting my Wisdom Teeth pulled (hilarious essay still forthcoming). What they did to me was heinous, no question about it. I had teeth sawn in half, corkscrewed straight out of the socket, wrapped around nerves, you name it. I even had part of my jawbone shaved down to keep my mouth from falling off, or something like that; the anesthesia came on hard halfway during the instructions. They even cut a portion of my gumline and flapped it over in order to surgically remove an impacted tooth (I think they said it was near my spinal cord), later stitching it up and making a solemn vow to never speak of the incident again, only to have me force it out of them days later at the follow-up consult. It hurt, I couldn't eat and I swallowed a gallon of blood. It was a tremendous pain in the ass, and I'm sincerely glad it's over.

The point I'm making is this. I'd get my Wisdom Teeth pulled every day for a month before I willingly allowed a robot to peel my cornea off and fiddle with my ocular jelly.

I know it's relatively painless. I know the success rate is through the roof. I know that the aftercare is boringly cut and dry. Don't care. Too scary. What that oral surgeon did to me was worthy of any Torture Porn movie, but I'd do it all over again if I knew it would save my vision just as good as LASIK could.

When you come home from LASIK, your eyes are still in the process of healing from the incisions, so they make you sleep with goggles on. Know why? So you don't accidentally claw your corneas out while you sleep. Can...can you even fathom something so horrible? One moment, you're blissfully and subconsciously scratching a light itch in the corner of your eye. The next moment, you're screaming in front of the bathroom mirror, fingers crimson and gooey as you slowly fade into permanent blindness.

Okay, maybe that's not what would happen, but I'm not taking any chances.

Perhaps I'm taking my good eyeballs for granted, and don't know what I'd be willing to do in exchange for perfect vision because I've always had it. Maybe if I equated LASIK to something I really wanted to change about my body, I'd be more willing to accept the temporary discomfort for the lifetime of satisfaction. For example, I suppose I'd put up with the zappin' and flappin' if it made me five inches taller. Or if it leveled off that weird peg lateral tooth that I have. Or if it decreased my penis size so I could wear shorts in the Summer for once. When you put it that way, it's already starting to hit home a little more for me.

In short, the Missus is a trooper, and I hope that LASIK is everything she thought it would be; instantly remedying her longtime struggles with vision and allowing the world to see her beautiful eyes without the barrier of prescription lenses.

Eventually, that is. She'll be wearing those giant Senior Citizen sunglasses for awhile.

In the Alternate Timeline, Kate takes Claire to the hospital so she can have her baby, shortly after finding out that the adoption fell though. On the Present Day Island, Dogen is worried that the recently-resurrected Sayid might be batshit evil, just like Present Day Claire.

That's it.

I'm serious.

Sound off in the comments section and enjoy your weekend. If you want to continue obsessing over Lost, check out my buddies over at Surviving 815; they'll take good care of you. In the meantime, here's a link to every Lost Friday so far this season. See you next time.

Season 6 - Episode 1/2.

Yeah, there was a lot of time wasted to show how creative the Lost team was to come up with a way for Claire's baby adventure in a non-crash world to closely resemble how it was in a crash world.

Couldn't this have been handled earlier in the show's history?
No kidding. I guess the writers feel pretty damn confident that they can answer all of the relevant questions, because they're actually wasting Season 6 episodes on an Alternate Timeline Kate story that could have taken all of 5 minutes to settle.

Furthermore, the Island folk were lounging around in the Temple so much that you could almost feel their boredom.

This wasn't a bad episode, but 'uncharacteristically substanceless' seems fitting.
One word: filler. Wait. One more: boring.

I effing can't stand Claire. You know what bothered me? She gave Kate her credit card. How would she be paying for the hospital/doctor care for the birth of her demon bay-beeeeee, then? I can take all of the clunky space-time and supernatural/occult plot devices, but the characters doing truly dopey crap like hand over possibly their only resource to take care of themselves (and new hellspawn) in a totally foreign country where they have no friends/family? That's where I draw the line. And bringing the character back? Reeks of excuse to have Kate go gallavanting after James all love-lorn and guilty and crap. Next week's episode promises to be more compelling, and will hopefully move the story along.
Indeed. Concerning the credit card, the only thing I can think of is that it's going to act as a connecting plot device, much like Kate stealing Jack's pen on the plane in order to pick her handcuffs later. I don't think (or hope) they would have spent as much time on it if it was just a small-talk moment between Claire and Kate.
Yeah, this episode did not really impress me. Although, after the amazing premiere, I don't know if they could have immediately topped it. As my dad pointed out, this being the last season, they've got a lot of stuff to get through and having a lame episode is a little painful when you know they're limited. Also, LOL to the Sarah Palin photo. Genius.
Wow, A Kate-centric episode that sucked? I'm surprised!!

The only really interesting thing that happened this episode(apart from Sayiid acting like a total WUSS!!) was The Others hinting at events outside of the Temple. It made me realize that 3 years have passed since they have been on the island. Obviously things have been happening which we have NO CLUE about. So not only is there a new storyline about the plane not crashing, they are really back to square 1 on the island since they can't possible just pick up where they left off.
Thanks for the ass kissing. It's always appreciated. ;)

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